Axioma
by Aprito
Summary: A mission, a conflict, and a duty. Sakura's here to pass and surpass them, or so she believed. "If equals are subtracted from equals, the remainders are equal."
1. See the sun

Her shishou's touch on her shoulder is gentle as Tsunade guides her through the maze they seem to be moving in, constantly taking turns left and right.

Yes, that was the deal, they said. Sakura had to be blindfolded for the safety of the operation, in order not to reveal the location. From the hollowness of their steps echoing against walls she cannot tell where they begin and end, they were underground now.

This deal is already putting a dent in her own confidence.

"We're almost there, Kazekage-sama." A man ahead of the group muttered, and Sakura could feel Tsunade's grip on her tighten just a little bit.

"Gaara, with all respect, this place doesn't give me the best of memories."

"We won't be in here for long, Tsunade-san."

They weren't supposed to be here in the first place. After the war, Sakura was immediately placed under Tsunade's care, traveling along with her mentor and Shizune to the other villages in order to help the still injured and instruct the yet-to-become medic-nin. The mission in itself wouldn't have been so long, if Tsunade wasn't infamous for spontaneous detours to the next gambling town, not only to enjoy to empty another bottle of sake, but also to perform not-so-official check ups of the poorer civilians who couldn't afford to travel to the bigger villages, let alone live in them.

As requested by her shishou, it had been Kakashi's first order as the sixth Hokage, not only to restore order with the other villages, but also to spread the scientific breakthroughs Konoha had kept secret for many years. He had looked older than he was in that chair, Sakura remembers, an eye-patch covering his empty socket, Gai sitting near the desk in his wheelchair, while Yamato was standing right to the former captain of Team 9.

She supposes he also wanted Team 7 separated for a while, so she never found out what happened to Naruto and Sasuke after Tsunade took care of them.

That happened nearly two years ago. Truth to be told, she was anxious about a reunion. Essentially, she had not been there when Sasuke was put on trial, not there when he emigrated into the village, not there when Naruto had been there, not there when-

 _What if they suddenly decided they didn't need her anymore?_

She'd rather not go back to face that potential reality.

But here they were. Tsunade had received call from Suna for a mission so important, Shizune busted into the room they were staying at while working in Kumogakure – their current mission declared canceled. Sakura didn't think she had been involved then, until Tsunade had shown her the scroll with the Kazekage's insignia on it.

"We're here." Another voice, echoes behind her, and Sakura remembers it to be Kankuro's, who had come in Temari's place.

Tsunade loses her grip on Sakura's shoulder to remove the blindfold, and the absence of her comforting touch instills the not-too-unfamiliar feel of an earthquake in her body, a gift from her late mother named anxiety.

Sakura tries not to curse as she looks around.

"Orochimaru's lair?"

Gaara enters the room without answering her right away, but she can hear the faint mutterings of this being only one of them.

Gaara was never much of a big talker, his admirable speech back in the war notwithstanding.

Just now she sees recognizes the face of the guard she heard earlier. This cracked white skin and glowing yellow eyes were different from the colorless ones he used to have, shielded by his round glasses.

"Don't let him bother you, Sakura. Kabuto was the better option of the two."

Frankly, this does little to calm Sakura down, but it successfully manages to turn her incoming panic attack into pure unadulterated aggression.

"We're not exactly on good terms, Kankuro."

Kabuto smiles, bearing closer resemblances to the immortal Sannin than his usual evil self.

 _Rotten traitorous snake bastard-_

The door shuts behind them, and Sakura's eyes dart over to the various tanks and contraptions – working – the light a stark contrast to the dimly lit hallways.

To her disappointment, no notes to steal have been left.

Gaara briefly coughs into his hand, before Kankuro scurries over to unfold one of his many scrolls strapped to his body.

"We'll discuss the terms here. It wasn't...exactly safe enough to pass it through paper."

Sakura's trying her hardest to listen to Gaara right now, she really is, but she also wants to go and wipe Kabuto's smirk off his face before shattering it all together. Good riddance.

Tsunade giving her a gentle shove fortunately brings her back to business.

"As your mentor should already informed you, Sakura-san, no one outside of this room is allowed to know about the true nature of this operation." Gaara's glossy green eyes give her little inquiry to his thoughts right now, but the unspoken cue is there.

 _Not even Naruto._

"He is to be brought to our village at the age of 13, having completed his education at the Ninja Academy in Konohagakure. For your and his safely, you will decide on a different name to call him."

"Furthermore," Kankuro was in her plain sight, and she could see him move from side to side the same way a child about to receive their presents would. His little dance of joy ceases when Gaara glances at him, but the giddiness remains. "you will teach him chakra control. We are planning to have him rebuild the puppet brigade."

"He's the greatest mind Suna's ever produced." Kankuro intercepts, and Sakura can't exactly blame him for his state, even if she was _definitely_ not in the mood to do cartwheels. "He'll be a great help to us. You should view yourself as a hero."

"But" Sakura cuts him off – Kankuro was starting to creep her out. "why me?"

Kankuro stares at her, as if he was _puzzled_ that she'd ask such a question.

"Don't you remember? You were the one that had the most influence on him, Sakura." Kankuro footsteps pick up before he's right in front of her, grabbing her by her shoulders. "You said it right to my face." He smiles, but she feels anything but comforted in this room. "You'll save him. Make him a better person, and a service to Sunagakure."

Sakura remembers it well. Her encounter with the late criminal from Sunagakure loomed over her like shadow, judging her on her failures and achievements. She had nightmares for weeks after that fight, her scar a painful reminder of the poisoned sword dug deep into her in a seemingly futile attempt to save Lady Chiyo. But she also remembers how fragile he had looked in his last moments, the cruel reality of the life he's never quite escaped crushing every amount of resistance. His offer to make her like him escaped his thoughts in one of his last breaths, but they both knew he couldn't make that wish of his into another reality.

In his last moments, he's looked – human.

She remembers how Chiyo had softly smiled at the parting of her kin, and how heavy the sorrow she felt was, looking at him, embraced by the puppets he's made.

In a way, she was fulfilling Chiyo's last hopes – the hope that under different circumstances, he wouldn't have turned out the way he did.

But there was another side to the deal, the reason she hasn't backed down the last 5 months since they were informed. Pride washed over her, her urge for validation and the acknowledgment she was craving all her life, the credit she did not get after the war, all of it overwhelming her train of rational thought. Maybe she wouldn't be hailed as a hero the way Naruto had been hailed after saving Konoha - the world - from impending disasters - but the knowledge that she was picked among countless elite - it prickled her skin with excitement.

It was a deal benefiting every party involved.

"May I-" Sakura slowly removed Kankuro's hands from her person, and turned her gaze to Gaara, aware of how Tsunade was watching her closely. "May I see him?"

"Of course, Sakura-san." Gaara nods at Kabuto, and gestures her to follow them. "The procedure is finished, isn't it?"

"Orochimaru-sama has passed down his talents to me, Kazekage-sama." Kabuto pushes his glasses against his pale nose. "It's almost like we had worked with a surrogate mother."

Sakura briefly registers that neither Tsunade or Kankuro follow them as they enter another room, less lit than the previous one, but not less impressive. More tanks lined up in the circular room - empty, to her relief - despite that not all of them were in working order. Sakura had a vague idea of how Kabuto had worked in here, but to further her surprise, _he_ wasn't locked up in them, anymore.

In the center lies an incubator, several tubes attached to it. From where she's standing, Sakura is not able to see the infant, so she walks – hesitant in her step – towards it.

"We've infused a technique that allowed us to lower his heartbeat, put him into a premature coma, so to speak. He was removed from the test tubes just recently."

Sakura isn't able to hide her curiosity at this scientific discovery, no matter how much she despises the man beside her. Even Konoha hadn't digged beyond what was already dubious experimentation on consenting subjects, alive and deceased..

"Did you use his real DNA?" her hand touches the glass gently, tracing the tubes, trying to make sense of the situation. Kabuto must have gotten a hold of tissue, and she wonders whether he keeps the core around, too.

There was no time to return to river country, however.

"We wouldn't have been able to rebirth him so perfectly if I hadn't. I used the samples I recovered back when I worked with Zetsu and the Edo Tensei Technique."

Kabuto is halted in his attempt to get closer to her, maybe because it was so cramped, maybe because he took a sudden liking to giving her goosebumps.

Her grip on his wrist was tight, but not tight enough to break it. The smell of the dry desert reminds her that Gaara was still in the room.

"Don't you ever-" she glared at him, her rage making her body quake, hoping it wouldn't let him notice how utterly _terrified_ she was. "Touch me."

Kabuto blinks, and she releases him.

"He is ready to take with you, foolish girl." He smiles again, and she turns to look at the baby, checking to see if he breathed normally.

This was truly not a dream.

She opens the incubator herself, removing the top as to allow her to take the child, carefully cradling him the way Tsunade had taught her months ago when they were present at the birth of premature triplets in Iwa.

His eyes were closed, so she isn't able to check how brown they were, but the little fluff of red atop his head indicates that she wouldn't have to.

They exit the side room, and Tsunade takes the child as Kankuro blindfolds her.

"Remember, Sakura-san." she hears Gaara, but she can't pinpoint from where his voice comes from. "You must not call him by his real name. We do not know how many ANBU keep old copies of their bingo books around." A beat. "As of current, we cannot afford this loss."

They're navigating through the maze again, but their steps grow slower, and the air fresher.

Sakura hears the crunch of her boots against wet grass, a tell tale sign that they were outside again. She removes the blindfold herself, and immediately realizes that Kabuto must have left, the snake-human hybrid nowhere in sight.

"You may however name him as you please." Gaara continues "Temari and a team of my own ANBU – not confided in this – will travel with you shortly. Be careful."

"Of course, Kazekage-sama." There's that feeling of needles prickling her skin, self-doubt that claws into her mind. There's no denying that above all that, there are no other people to confide in.

Her shishou doesn't look nervous at all as she gives the infant back to Sakura. _Oh, how she admired her mentor in these moments_

"I have to go back to Shizune, since she's staying in Suna, right now." Tsunade's tone was confident, but her honey-brown eyes shine softly in pure contrast. "Summon Katsuyu if you need me. You will have to report to Kakashi when you're in Konoha."

Sakura returns her gaze to the infant in her arms, focusing on the comforting lull of his breathing against her chest, his tiny fists clenched.

 _So this will be the only time I ever get to say it. Huh._

"Welcome back, Sasori."

* * *

A/N: Hello! This project's been on the backburner for nearly two years now, but truth to be told, I haven't attempted a multi-chaptered work since 2009-ish. I got a pretty clear idea of the key-points and the ending, and sketched down the first half of the story, but I am always open to questions and suggestions that I'll try to incorporate. I hope you'll like it, and please don't forget to leave kudos if you did!


	2. Feedbacker

The walk back was hard, but fortunately spared from any confrontations or natural occurrences. She didn't make it far when Temari and her men met her on the way to Konoha, her shishou and the other two Sabaku siblings on their way back to Suna. They traveled for 5 days, and to her own surprise, she found herself regularly checking that Sasori was still alive, the jutsu that Kabuto put on the child not dissolved until she was on Leaf ground. The ANBU rarely paid her attention when they camped for the night, the child clutched against her to assure nobody would try to steal it, her own blanket wrapped around him to ensure he wouldn't freeze to death.

There was only one time, when Temari had sat with her, sharing the food someone else on the team had brought with them. Crisp fire burning wood - the only comforting sound in the dead of the night.

„What's his name?" she says, using her chopsticks to give Sakura another strip of meat.

Most of the ANBU had put their masks back on, so she couldn't tell whether they listened in or not.

„It's-" It was hard to tell what would become of him, maybe it was predefined destiny, maybe it was epigenes.

But she had a mission to accomplish, and a village tie to uphold. She wasn't allowed failures.

„It's Shuuya."

Temari turns her eyes upwards in thought, her legs stretched out in tomboyish fashion. „A learner?"

Sakura removes one hand to draw the appropriate Kanji in the air. „Not quite."

„Ah!" Temari exclaims, grinning, reminding her eerily of her younger brother, Kankuro. „'An excellent beginning'. My bad. When did you give birth?"

Sakura readjusts her grip, hoping no one in her group was occupied with analyzing her body language and concluding that she was a terrible liar, because Temari was doing an _excellent job_. _So much for my "A dying mother wanted me to have him" heroic adoption tale_. She thinks.

„He's barely 2 months old."

„Doesn't feel very safe to me."

Temari wasn't wrong, but she was also making it harder on her freshly fabricated story.

„I suppose I shouldn't ask about the father."

„It's best if you don't." Sakura smiles, and takes the cue to stand up, making sure Sasori wouldn't fall out of her reach. „Who's on guard tonight?"

Temari uses her chopsticks to point at a man with an owl mask, seemingly uncaring to her rude gesture. „This guy."

„Ah." The owl-man in question doesn't react to being called, but he didn't seem threatening to her. „I will be going to sleep then."

„Sure." Temari takes the hint and stands up as well. It's funny, Sakura thought, how much Temari was towering over her in height at this point. „I'll accompany you to the tent."

„How noble of you, Temari-san."

„Drop the suffix." Temari rolls her stiff shoulders, and flashes her a toothy grin. „I'm seeing one of your friends, after all."

Sakura hasn't been in Konoha for the past two years, so she isn't exactly sure who Temari was referring to. _Do I really want to know?_

* * *

When she arrived in the early morning hours in Konoha, not a soul was found on the streets, sparing her - for now - from any unwanted questions or prying eyes. Good for her, because as soon as she parted from Temari with the knowledge that the eldest sand sibling would have to come back soon enough, and closed in on Konoha grounds, the bundle in her arms started squirming.

The jutsu wasn't working anymore.

The trip to the apartment was swift, despite having to hurry through the streets - Sakura didn't trust herself to jump over rooftops with an _infant_ in her arms - and entering her small welcoming space gave a sense of security she didn't realise she had longed for on her trip.

Little changed in the last two years she was gone. An elderly neighbour of hers had occasionally come by to water the plants, but nothing else seemed to have been touched upon her arrival. It was a one-person apartment, near the hospital, mostly meant for employees and retired shinobi. At the time, her parents decided to move out of Konoha into one of the smaller villages within fire country, and she couldn't afford to pay rent for her former, much larger home - so Tsunade pulled a few strings for her to settle into this place. It was small, but it would do.

"Thank god, you didn't start screaming." she resisted to urge to simply plop on the couch in exhaustion, instead entering the bedroom to lay the baby on the bed - gently - unfolding the bundle further to come face to face with the cocoa brown eyes she's expected him to have. Sakura lets her legs give out under her finally, her toes curling under the familiar feel of her carpet while her upper body was still on the bed. She huffs. "I'm already tired."

Sasori at this stage, of course, isn't able to comment much on her fatigue. It's still a surreal thought to her, a reincarnation of the late criminal of Suna for her to be raised by, molded and shaped into a person Lady Chiyo had always wished for him to become.

"I'm only 19, so don't call me mom." She brushes her knuckle against his cheek. "Besides, you're like what? 39? Creepy."

Sasori gurgles, and Sakura likes to think he's probably being offended.

"You can call me Aunty. Aunty Sakura- Nevermind, that's weird, too."

A glance at her bedside clocks tells her that the sun was starting to rise, and she'd have to report to Kakashi as soon as Shizune comes back. (She herself would have prefered Shizune travel with her from the very beginning, but Suna liked to be tight about secrecy among other formalities.)

Slowly, she positions her hands at each side, lifting herself of the mattress, quickly realising how every muscle in her body _ached_ for a nap in her sweet feathery bed after nights upon nights of thin tents and itchy futons.

 _Speaking of which-_

Sakura's eyes widen, but the baby doesn't look in her direction, focusing his gaze on one of her stuffed bears.

"I have to ask Shizune to lend me some money." She bends down to search through the backpack for her wallet, and finds spare ryos. "I don't even have any means to feed you around here. Let alone pay rent." She was already used to having Shizune deal with their funds, damn.

"Technically, you're Suna's responsibility, not mine." Sakura throws her wallet in the general direction of her backpack, narrowing her eyes at nothing in particular, before returning to the bed. "I should just have them pay for the entire mis-"

The doorbell rings, and ceases her voice abruptly, moving a finger to shush the both of them instead.

Sakura doesn't close the door to the bedroom, but makes sure the curtains and windows remain closed, lest this be her first assassination attempt.

On the other side of the front door, a woman sighs.

"Sakura, it's just me, Shizune."

Very slowly, Sakura opens the door to her apartment, coming face to face with the amused expression of the older shinobi, holding a very giddy Tonton in her arms. Sakura checks the surroundings for any possible traps, and when everything is cleared, she opens the door wider, inviting Shizune in without any further inquiry.

"Good morning to you, Sakura. Did you sleep yet?"

Sakura yawns in reflex, and Shizune lets out a short laugh, setting Tonton down to untie her sandals.

"I actually arrived just an hour ago."

"Really?" Shizune moves to check on the child immediately, leaving Sakura to follow her back to the bedroom. "I was faster than you, then."

"Temari and I took a different route to avoid being seen." Sakura explains, and blinks her eyes at the woman in front of her. Shizune was using her medical chakra to check on Sasori.

She hums in response, checking to see if all of his limbs moved accordingly, and receiving more gurgles in return.

"He's as healthy as he can be. How old?"

"Two months, I believe." Sakura lets Shizune carry the child as they move to the small adjoined kitchen in the living room. She really needed some coffee, right now.

"That seems about right. This little guy right here might be able to focus on objects, but he doesn't turn his head when we talk." Shizune says. "At this stage, babies need about 15 hours of sleep, but there's no telling how his sleeping patterns with be. It'll be easier for you if you take notes to adjust to his cycle." It doesn't surprise Sakura how oddly gleeful Shizune was behaving at the time of day, her being very much fond of children. Maybe it was better to just let her handle the entire thing?

Her thought process is interrupted when the coffee machine beeps, grabbing the mug and taking a tentative sip. It's bitter, and she grimaces, but there were no sweeteners around to milden the taste of.

Shizune holds out a finger, and the baby reacts to it, grabbing it with his own tiny, pudgy hand. "What's his name?"

"Saso-" She catches herself again. "Shuuya."

Shizune glances at her, but refrains from commenting on the slip up any further. "It's a pretty name."

The caffeine is kicking in now, to her absolute joy, trying her hardest to ignore the aches.

"Isn't it? I kind of came up with it on a whim." She smiles, but Shizune doesn't look all that amused.

"This could get you killed faster than you can blink, Sakura. Best be if you don't address him by his old name at all."

Sakura snorts into her coffee. "That's harder than it sounds."

Shizune moves around the small space, grabbing items to see if the baby is able to hold them. "Just make sure to not shout it in public. Besides-"

Sakura finishes her drink, leaving it unwashed in the sink for the meantime. "I don't have anything around here, I know-"

"The sixth sent me. He still needs your report."

"Alright." Sakura rubs her eyes in frustration at the comment; Couldn't Kakashi wait two more hours before demanding her to move? "Will you stay here?"

Shizune turns towards her, and Sakura notes that Sasori seems to have fallen asleep again. "I think I can handle it."

* * *

"Shizune forwarded me your reports." Kakashi shifts in his chair to get a better look through the stacks and stacks of paper surrounding him. "She said you were a great help."

Sakura straightens from her bow to reply properly. "Thank you, Hokage-sama."

"Don't call me that." Kakashi rolls his eye, and Sakura notices that a great of silver-white hair is covering up the other - non existent - eye. He raises his hand and stops at a certain level from where he sits. "I've known you since you were this young."

Now it's _Sakura's_ turn to roll her eyes. "Alright, Kakashi-sensei."

His mask does a great deal of concealing his facial features, but his eye crinkles into a smile.

"We won't be registering your little experiment."

"Huh?" Sakura looks up in surprise. "What about the formal-"

"Kakashi."

A third person joins the room, and Sakura turns around to come face to face with Yamato, who raises his hand in meek effort.

"Yo."

"Yamato-taichou!" Sakura's face lights up, as she hasn't seen or heard anything from the man the last time she's left. "How have you and Gai been doing?"

"We all three have been doing very well, Sakura." Kakashi intercepts, so all the focus is back on him. "But we're not here to talk about that. I invited Yamato for a certain reason."

Yamato walks past her to grab one of the chairs present to sit on them. "You met Kabuto."

 _Oh, so that's what this is about._

"Yes, there was no information to steal."

Yamato is hesitant in his question, leaning forward in his chair. "Was Orochimaru around?"

Both men stare at her, and when she gives no reply, Kakashi gets up to stand next to Yamato, a scroll in his hand. "You probably aren't too familiar with Orochimaru's projects, but Yamato used to be one of Orochimaru's….experiments. Just like-"

Sakura knows who he's referring to. "I named him Shuuya."

"Shuuya, it is." Yamato's body is tense, so Kakashi lays a hand on his shoulder. "I have to be frank with you, Sakura. Suna suffered a lot of losses during the war, many Shinobi who were partly responsible for holding up the inner security system. Suna might be at peace now, but we can tell they're at a very vulnerable state."

"We haven't confided with the elder council in this when we agreed to the operation." Yamato says, his body seemingly relaxed, but the edge in his voice gives him away. "To resort to cooperation with Orochimaru... there must be a bigger gain behind this. We were wondering if Kabuto or Gaara have revealed anything."

Sakura thinks back to the stoic faces of the Kazekage and the self-sufficient smirk of the Sannin's minion, but neither of them were ready to reveal anything beyond pragmatic decisions. "We set up a few conditions for handling Shuuya's further education, but there wasn't anything else."

Kakashi sighs.

"We suspected so. Yamato will be sent away soon for investigations regarding Orochimaru and an organisation claiming to work for him, so we hoped you'd have more leads."

Sakura shrugs, and it's all she can do within her rules of support. "Sorry."

Kakashi seems final in his speech, and Sakura isn't really sure how to react, her eyes wandering the room, unable to focus on one object at a time."Is that...all?"

Kakashi returns to his seat, and Sakura realises he must have passed the scroll to Yamato. "One more thing."

Kakashi fumbles for a pen on his desk, missing the object by a scant inch, before succeeding in grabbing it. "I am little concerned in the operation itself, but I don't believe it will plan out the way Gaara wants it to."

Sakura is taken back at the statement, swallowing the urge to accuse him of claiming her incompetent out of impulse. The more rational part of her brain begs her to hear him out.

She grits her teeth, and Kakashi's eye crinkles again. Whether it was reflex, or intention, she can't tell.

"Some people don't change - no matter how much Suna is inclined to believe so. They have a stellar example at the top, after all."

Kankuro flashes through her mind briefly, and a tiny part of her wants to agree with Kakashi - but she's already made her bed, and now she has to lay in it.

"Kakashi-sensei, I'm afraid your doubts will do little to shake mine."

"I understand, Sakura. My students were always very stubborn to begin with." Yamato gets up to stand next to Sakura, and nods when Kakashi spares him a glance. "You don't have to worry about formalities; I won't interfere with your decisions, but I also won't be able to help you. Keep that in mind."

"Ah, about the formalities-" A beat. "Temari made me lie about the child being biologically related to me, and her ANBU were around when it happened, so I'm not sure whether it being unaffiliated would be a good idea."

With a village that values tradition as much as Konoha and their bigger clans do, how could she not?

Kakashi raises his head - as if in thought - but from where she stands, he seems to be squinting at the ceiling lamp.

She'd have to write Tsunade about possible signs of faulty eyesight.

"I see... Yamato." Kakashi points in the general direction of a pile of documents, stacked in a corner. "The register."

Yamato leaves her side to cross the small room, picking up a heavy book she's seen on Tsunade's desk before. He places it on said desk, and as Kakashi requests right after, turns the page to her family tree.

Kakashi rolls the pencil within his fingers.

"Have you made up the identity of the father, Sakura?"

"No, I haven't but I-"

"Have your parents agreed to let you raise a fatherless child, Sakura?"

That thought hadn't even occurred to her, even when she was aware that her mother hated anything that breathed from the general direction of wind country. _Shit._

Her silence is a sufficient reply to Kakashi who closes the book and drops the pencil into Yamato's hand. The repetition of his sentence feels mocking to her.

"We won't be registering your little experiment." _It'd only make things more complicated._ "You're dismissed. Make sure to report back to me at least once a month."

* * *

The walk through the tower with Yamato is awkward, but to her own admission, she spent the larger portion of it trying to calm her own impulses in order not to burst out in tears - or smash the entire building to pieces.

When Sakura finally feels decently approachable again, she speaks. "Yamato-taichou."

The older man doesn't react, walking next to her right side as if- as if she hasn't spoken at all. It's not until Sakura deliberately halted her steps that Yamato turns around in confusion. "What's wrong, Sakura-san?"

She crosses her arms, and narrows her eyes. "You weren't answering, that's all."

Yamato's blinks, and his confusion shifts into realisation, rubbing the back of his head in apology. A smile crosses his face. "I figured you didn't know, yet."

He isn't wearing his metal plate, she notices. Yamato's hand moves from the back to the left side of his head - pointing at his ear. "I was caught in an explosion, and the damage evaporated my hearing on this side."

Now it's Sakura's turn to be surprised, and she comes closer to get a better look. It's faint, but scars litter the entire area, his ear even looking a little deformed. "Is the outer ear cosmetic?"

"Synthetic, yes."

Sakura actually feels a bit guilty over her ignorance, so she apologizes, and Yamato waves his hand, mutely communicating his acceptance.

They fall back into step, and Sakura makes sure to switch sides before asking. "Isn't that dangerous on missions?"

"I'm lucky to being able to rely on earthly vibrations and lip-reading for compensation." Yamato says. The silence following is awkward, and he is quick to change the topic.

"Bye the way," Sakura hums in response, and Yamato continues. "Have you kept in contact with Naruto?"

Sakura is glad that they weren't walking down stairs - because she would have tripped and broken a few bones in response to that statement. She wasn't really ready to tell Yamato that she's fumbled for explanations of her letter exchanges coming to an abrupt end, that her evil little mind kept her up with thoughts of Team 7 doing just fine without her at night, sending her anxiety on a roller coaster of emotions that left her unable to work at times. So she did what she did best - avoided having to reply to the loud mouthed blonde.

They come to a stop before a door, much to her surprise, and Sakura remarks that she forgot to answer. "We haven't... exchanged letters in a while."

"I see…" Whether Yamato deliberately or unintentionally means to imitate Kakashi in this moment, she doesn't know. His silence is short-lived however, as he opens the door and another voice pierces through the quiet, busy tower. Before Sakura knows it, a blur of orange tackles her, and Yamato sidesteps the impending crash gracefully. This is _exactly_ what she didn't plan on doing today.

 _Curse her karma._

"Sakura-chan!" Is Naruto _crying_? God. "They kept me locked in this room! All night!"

Sakura begins to feel breathless in the quite literal sense, so she pushes Naruto off of her. "Hold on for a moment-"

"Naruto, it's not my fault you're refusing to do the paperwork." Shikamaru's languid voice can be heard inside the room, and from where Sakura is standing, she also sees the silhouette of Sai napping on the couch. Yamato gently pushes both of them into the office and Shikamaru raises his hand in salute, not looking a bit different from the Shikamaru who's waved them off at the gate two years ago. "It's been a while, Sakura."

She smiles. "You haven't changed at all."

He eyes her briefly, snorting. "Naruto hasn't either. Whether that is a blessing or curse is such a _drag_ to discuss."

Sakura looks at the boy glued to her arm, and can't help but agree, at least on a personality-related level. Appearance wise, Naruto's hair was shorter now - it didn't suit him, but maybe she was just not used to it - and he's definitely grown at least a few inches, not to mention that-

"Wait, Naruto. Get off me for a moment." She peels Naruto's left arm off of her to turn her attention to his right arm, which she had remembered blown to pieces the last time she's seen him. She gropes for a pulse, and is pleased to find one under the white bandages.

"I can't believe they actually fixed it. Tsunade-shishou is a miracle worker."

"Huh?" Naruto's briefly dumbfounded at her statement, before her implication strikes him. He flashes her toothy bright smile. "Oh yeah, Grandma Tsunade fixed that one for me. It's just like the real thing!" As if on cue, Sakura can feel his powerful chakra flowing through the arm. "One the other hand, Sas-"

Shikamaru slamming his hand on the desk is what draws everyone's attention back to the jounin. Sai, however, is unfazed by the noise surrounding him, not even stirring in his sleep. "Naruto, get back to work. I'm not going to do it for you."

"Work?" Sakura plays along hoping she could leave this room without Naruto finishing that _other_ sentence. "Are you two working for the Hokage?"

"Sakura, you haven't cut your hair in ages." Naruto - whether he was deaf or intentionally ignoring Shikamaru - grabs a handful of her shoulder length pink locks, much to her annoyance. She hadn't realised how much she valued her developed personal bubble now that Naruto hadn't been around for a while, either.

Shikamaru cuts in before she can scold him however. "I help the Hokage here and there." He gestures to the stack of paper left on another table. "Naruto, on the other hand, is here to become one."

Sakura's eyes widen in shock, and Naruto keeps his grin locked in place, blue eyes shining in pride. "I'll be able to protect the village for real, this time. It won't be for a few years, but there isn't much to do outside of Konoha, and Kakashi-sensei said I should start early."

Sakura should have seen it coming, and she's happy for him, but she also has a hard time imagining an older Naruto slumped over mountains of bureaucratic boredom. _But hey, if Tsunade's survived it, surely he will._

"If you keep procrastinating even on these simple D-Rank reviews, you'll never make it to the top," Shikamaru folds his hands behind his head in an eerily similar fashion to Naruto. "Idiot."

Naruto pouts, and she's not surprised that Shikamaru is so frustrated with him. Shikamaru yawns, rubbing his eyes, and Sakura is reminded that _she hasn't slept in 20 hours_. "Until Sasuke comes back, there's nothing to do for you, anyways."

 _Wait-_

"What?" Sakura blurts out. "Where is he?"

"He's been gone for a year now. Was imprisoned for a good while." Shikamaru's constant lazy attitude servers as quite the poker face, and he drawls out the next words as if they weren't a big deal. "You didn't know?"

The arm Sakura has been grabbing onto for a good while now begins to tense, and she releases her grip hastily. There she was, worrying that Team 7 was living the good 'ol life, but _Sasuke wasn't even in the village_.

Welp.

"Sakura-chan moved around too much, so I couldn't write her." Naruto smiles, possibly an attempt to avoid her wrath. "Right, Sakura-chan?"

Sakura's shoulders tense, but Shikamaru isn't even looking into their direction, moving towards the couch to plant a foot on Sai's stomach. She sighs.

"Yeah" A beat. She doesn't remember whether Shikamaru was even good at guessing a fib. "Right."

Yamato coughs, and Naruto jumps, probably having completely forgotten the silent man in the room. "Sakura-san."

"Aw, do you have to go already?" Naruto pouts again, and she already knows what's coming before he's letting the thought escape his mouth. "Can I come?"

She'd rather not have to explain the current predicament in her bedroom on her first day.

"You don't leave this tower before you've finished these for the Hokage." Shikamaru grabs Naruto's collar, seemingly unsuccessful in awakening the ever so stubborn Sai.

Among all the protests, Yamato shows her the way out before Naruto can, and so she sends a weak wave before the door closes behind her and a loud shrieks emits from it. It's not before they're out of the tower, that Sakura speaks. "Thanks."

"Don't mention it. Besides, Shizune is waiting for us."

* * *

It's not until early afternoon that they make it back to her place, Sakura having to stock her fridge on the way home. (She hadn't even realised how quickly time passed between leaving the apartment and coming back to it, hoping Shizune wouldn't be sore with her.)

As she was unpacking whatever she had quickly grabbed on the market, Yamato was embraced warmly by Shizune, who asked, much to her confusement, about a person named Botan, and whether the delivery went smoothly.

Did Yamato have a child with someone?

When late afternoon hits, and Sasori returns to sleep, they're still sitting around her small kitchen table. Her suspicions are very much intensified when Yamato - after checking Sasori for any possible genetic traps - hands her the scroll, and she unfolds it to find an envelope with money in it. "Take it. It's hard to raise a shinobi when you don't get to work for a while."

"Yamato-taichou." Sakura feels bit weird about it, but after seeing Yamato build her a perfectly sculptured wooden crib, she had to know. "I hope it's not inappropriate of me to ask, but are you married to someone named Botan now?" Sakura asks, and the way Shizune bursts into laughter immediately after makes her feel like she's a clown on display.

Yamato gives Shizune a gentle shove, but even his own seemingly dead eyes hold a sense of amusement to them. "Of course not." He coughs. "Botan is Kakashi's kid. Well, our child, that is."

Sakura is feeling awkwardly silent at her embarrassing question, so Shizune changes the topic. "I've examined Shuuya while you were gone." She places her small notebook on the table, urging Sakura to take it. "Nothing out of the ordinary, he behaves like any other baby would. I had no problems bottle feeding him. I've written everything Tsunade and I know in here, as Yamato's department means I'm back in the Hokage tower - so it'll be harder for me to help you."

"A child is a big responsibility, Sakura-san. Neither of us will be around for aid, so you're on your own for this one."

Sakura buries her face in her arms, a sleepless-induced headache incoming. "When can I go back to work?"

"Not for a while, but I can get someone to bring you hospital paperwork if money's tight."

Asking her parents, who weren't even in Konoha anymore, was out of question, so there weren't many more options left for her, either. She groans, and it comes out muffled.

Sakura raises her head, fiddling with the loose hair clip meaning to hold her overgrown bangs back. "I'll pick it up myself, thank you."

* * *

When Shizune, Tonton and Yamato leave in the evening, the little apartment feels oddly vacant again, the sun long set. Sakura pops a pain killer, and seats herself on the couch with a bowl of canned fruits, her ears trained for any noises coming from her bedroom, while her eyes are fixed on her small bookshelf. (She didn't have a tv, spent most of her time away, anyways.)

The full-body mirror near the entrance grabs her attention, and she puts her bowl down, staring at her reflection. Sakura plays with a strand of long pink hair the way Naruto has done it earlier, and frowns.

"I'm really due for a haircut."

Maybe she should ask Ino to help her? They haven't heard of the other in a while, but surely Ino wouldn't be angry with her, right?

Sakura blinks her heavy eyes, grabbing the bag Shizune left with her, and opens it on the small coffee table. Sakura, in all her frenzy, wasn't courageous enough to stroll into the next maternity section and buy the things herself, so Yamato promised to gift her a few items they wouldn't be needing anymore when Botan grows up. Shizune - bless her - had already thought a step further.

To her relievement, Naruto doesn't show up when her digital clock strikes 10, and so she goes to bed with good conscience, stealing a glance into the small crib beside her, where Sasori slept ever so soundly.

I _'m sure Shizune wouldn't mind if I called him that way within these walls._ She thinks, folding her hand gently over the sleeping child's.

The quiet doesn't last, and the first cry of the night pierces through the room approximately three hours later.

Sakura groans into her pillow.

"Welcome to the stone-cold reality, Sakura Haruno."

* * *

A/N:

Lots of exposition in this chapter, haha.

In case you are confused, I'm using the KYG children from gaikage/aerynlallaboso in this story! They are just super lovely and I am smitten. ;_;; You can find the post here, definitely check them out! post/123753501443/my-favourite-naruto-endgame-headcanon-is-the-one


	3. Peculiarities

Chapter 2

The walls are white, devoid of any decoration, and the familiar pristine atmosphere does little to tamper with Sakura's bad mood.

She would be lying if she said that her new _job_ helped diminish her longing to get her hands dirty, save the lives of the people in mind and mentor countless others. She knows _why_ she was picked, just not how incredibly unnatural it was for _her_ to assume the role of a guardian.

She hasn't thrown a kunai in a while, either.

"Ah, Haruno-san!" The receptionist - whose name keeps escaping Sakura's mind - flashes her a polite smile. "Have you come to pick up your homework?"

"Ha-ha." Sakura's reply is dry, but she hoped the young women before her would (definitely, _absolutely-_ ) not take it the wrong way, moving behind the desk to pick up her weekly stack of organisational reports left for the more unfortunate employees (read: her) of the hospital to do. "Is Shizune here, today?"

The receptionist in question is too busy to file her damn nails to turn around, but gives her an answer, anyways. "She checked in just a few hours ago."

"Thanks." Sakura huffs, shifting the stack of heavy papers between her arms, walking down the hallway to where she knew Tsunade and Shizune shared an office, the former being away while the latter spent some of the days she didn't have to jump in Yamato's or Shikamaru's place here.

The first few weeks have been a surprisingly quiet affair. Sakura spent most of her days holed up in her apartment, taking care of Sasori while simultaneously documenting his development for the reports Kakashi forwarded to Suna. She hadn't seen any of her friends in that while, usually leaving the house in the early morning or late evening hours, trying to convince herself that she wasn't avoiding uncomfortable encounters and the inevitable following questions.

So far, little was forthcoming.

Sasori himself proved himself to be lower on the maintenance scale than she'd feared. He acted a stark contrast to other much _much_ fussier babies his age, his only concerning point being his ever present fatigue, not being able to focus on one task for too long before longing for the sanctuary of his bed (a state that Sakura could very much relate to). She had wondered whether it had been a defect of the experiment or simple genetics, but it was hard to determine when Suna didn't keep any records of their infants around the way Konoha had been doing for a good while.

Sakura doesn't bother to knock on the door, positioning her elbow to open it accordingly without causing a giant mess in the hallway. She used to keep her documents in here too, back when she was an assistant to Tsunade, and spotting the other vacant seat in the room makes Sakura miss the woman who viewed her as kin.

"Sakura?" Shizune looks up in surprise, little Tonton taking a nap on her lap "Where's Shuuya?"

"I really wish you would leave me an operation or two once in a while." Sakura drops the stack on a drawer, rolling her stiff shoulder blades. "He's sleeping at this time of the day."

Shizune eyes her briefly, before opening another drawer attached to her desk, setting a document of which nature Sakura didn't bother to know aside. "I met Gai the other day. He told me Kakashi has been sneaking home more often because he couldn't stand to leave Botan out of his sight."

Sakura frowns, knowing that Shizune doesn't have to spell the implication out to her. _Careless_. "You'll be able to go back to work when he's older."

"The receptionist torments me."

"You'll get used to it."

"Shizune-"

"I know you're not fond of it, but until Takamura recovers we have to stick with Yoshihiko." Shizune gives a pat to Tonton, signaling that the women wanted to get up, and Tonton complies accordingly. She moves around the desk to stand before the younger apprentice, a closer look revealing the fine lines around Shizune's eyes, and Sakura wonders if Shizune was ever taught the Byakuguou in the first place.

"I'm sorry Sakura, but I don't think it's wise to take up more work than we're providing for you already."

As much as Sakura valued Shizune - who only means well, of course - resists the urge to roll her eyes. _You're just making me do all the paperwork._

Sakura sighs, picking up the stack of papers to go back home. She isn't out of the door when Shizune speaks.

"The weather outside is beautiful, have you taken Shuuya out to see yet?"

* * *

"I'm home." Sakura enters the bedroom after putting the papers on the desk - absolutely not looking forward to completing them during her breaks - peeking over the crib.

There he was, looking up at her, cooing in response to her presence. Carefully, she puts her hands around his back to lift him out of his little bed. "Did you miss me?"

Sasori turns his head at the sound of her voice, struggling to form a proper response, but his babbling makes her content all the same. She holds him against her while she turns around to walk into the small kitchen, pouring herself a glass of water, while the baby forms his pudgy arms around her neck for security. "Shizune said I was careless about you, today. I guess she was right on some level; you woke up earlier than I expected."

Sasori doesn't reply to her comment, focused on the collar of her red top. It's fascinating to watch his development, she thinks. For the medic in her, it's uncharted territory, more than books could ever teach her about the inner working of humans yet to become shinobi.

Sakura moves to stand in front of the full length mirror, her grip around Sasori secure to make sure he wouldn't slip out of her grasp. Little distracts him from his current occupation, and she watches them in the reflection. It might have been how utterly young she looked - still _is_ -, but the picture present in front of her, even until now - something about it is... _off_. In fact, nothing about the image feels natural to her, despite the action in itself being so, like it wasn't something she was meant to do one way or another later down in life.

...Yes, that's all there is. She isn't sure whether she had stepped past viewing the child in front of her as the _experiment_ he was. She can see her face spouting a frown. _A machine_ , she thinks. _You're just maintaining a machine for a bunch of worried old farts in another village._

Was this the reason she avoided her friends, keeping the child caged while she was out running errands? Was it true what Shizune said, concluding she is already horribly uncomfortable with her predicament? Shizune had implied her irresponsible and childish, but it is hard to brush off the first few nights she's sat at the table, regretting what she has agreed to, for the sheer reason that it was holding her back in many more ways than just one. Yet, there was another part of her that didn't trust anyone else with - with _this._ Part of it Kankuro's insistence on her person, another simple character trait she's struggled with since childhood.

Sasori whines, unhappy with the attention not directed at him, and it snaps her out of her thoughts. She sighs, and seats the child on the carpet, so she could turn the mirror around, happy that it wasn't herself judging her anymore.

 _You're barely a few weeks in and acting like you've been stuck with him for years._

The early afternoon sun shines in from the balcony windows, and she opens the door, letting the fluttering breeze calm her mind.

If she keeps this lifestyle up, it'll only succeed in making her all the more depressed with these thoughts.

" _The weather outside is beautiful, have you taken Shuuya out to see, yet?"_

"Hey Sasori, you wanna go for a walk? These papers can wait a while."

* * *

Oddly enough, the first place Sakura visits wasn't the market - she wasn't quite ready to navigate the busy streets of said district just yet - but the training grounds just a little beyond the gates, where she knew freshly graduated wide-eyed genin were spending time with their aging jounin. Sakura's sitting away from the action on the other side of the river, Sasori seated in her lap while she helped him hold the bottle in place. She's been spared a few odd looks, but the headband helped her receive no further inquiry, the few shinobi that were there keeping their distance from her person.

She'd rather not have to explain why she allowed a kunai to pierce an infant in her next report.

Sasori's state of consciousness doesn't last, and it doesn't take long for him to fall asleep again. Sakura deemed herself too incompetent to tie the makeshift carrier earlier, so she opted for the slightly more inconvenient method of simply carrying him in her arms all the way. She knew he hadn't been all too familiar with louder environments and brighter colors, so the new influx of outer stimuli must have taken a toll on him.

She definitely looked forward to teaching him how to walk for the sake of her strained limbs.

Sakura didn't bring any books to occupy herself, so she contents with leaning against the tree while she observes the teams wrapping up their practise sessions. Few shinobi were actually training on their own, and watching the concentrated faces of the people both older and younger than her made her wish for someone to look after the child while she was tormenting whoever was unfortunate enough to cross her ambitious self.

 _Oh well._

When Sakura moves to leave the grounds, back into the village, Sasori is still asleep, and the position of the sun tells her that she had only been outside for less than three hours. It's not until she's crossed the gates that she makes out the first familiar face in months. She adjusts her grip on Sasori, taking a deep breath in and out, before approaching them. Said person in question had their back turned to her, and she manages to blurt out the first thought that comes to her mind.

"Wow, we haven't seen each other in a while, Lee."

Rock Lee turns around in surprise, before his face brightens, sending one of his famous toothy white smiles her way. She can attest that he hasn't changed one bit inner and outer appearance wise. "Sakura-san, what a surprise!"

"Uh, yeah." _Wow, smooth one._ "Did you just come back from a mission?" she asks, hoping that would somehow mask her anxious thoughts.

Lee flashes her another smile, and Sakura is not sure how he's even able to be in such a chipper mood all the time. "I was just on my way to visit Gai-sensei, actually." He points a finger at Sasori, to her horror, but his words are everything but judgmental. "I wish you the best of luck on your own mission, Sakura-san!"

Her first impulse thought _(Oh my god, does he know?)_ is brushed aside when uses the same finger to point to himself. "I'm on my way to see the ever so youthful Botan. Tenten asked me to help her out, too!"

This reminds Sakura that she actually hadn't seen Kakashi's child ever since Yamato informed her on their existence, and she steps around him just as he bids his goodbyes.

"Wait, let's go together."

* * *

She doesn't attempt further conversation on the way to the playground Gai and Tenten were supposedly residing at currently, and she is glad that Lee doesn't prompt her with questions.

The place itself is packed with children and their respective parents, most of which didn't seem old enough for the academy just yet. Lee spots Tenten faster than she does, and Sakura immediately notices that Tenten changed little in her appearance; the buns, white collared blouse, and hakama being ever present, while her gloves and large scroll were nowhere to be seen. As they move closer, Sakura moving carefully with her arms slung around Sasori, she realises Tenten hasn't heard them, the weapon master's hands gripping the much smaller hands of another child, helping them moving through the sand, an expression of mild frustration crossing her features.

 _Botan?_

"Gai-sensei, look who's here!"

"Ah, Sakura!" Gai waves at the two of them, and she turns her gaze away from Tenten to the older copy of Lee, sitting on a bench while his wheelchair was positioned next to it, and Sakura feels somewhat guilty at the sight. _Must be hard for him._

"Oh, don't make such a face, Sakura. I've been keeping up with my training just as powerful as ever." He raises both of his hands, and Sakura gets the implication. Gai's comment finally draws Tenten out of her routine, and she looks up in surprise at the trio. She huffs.

"Gai-sensei means he kicks me out of the bed to accompany him in his hand walks at 6, every morning." Tenten gives the child to Gai, who lets them sit on his lap, droopy eyes focused on her, their poofy silver-white hair a stark contrast to their tan skin.

She can see the resemblance.

Sakura brings herself to smile, and the child smiles back at her. "You must be Botan."

Botan folds their hands together, and they smile, before replying, voice shy and quiet.

"Hello"

Botan doesn't point the same way Lee and Gai do, but their folded hands appear from underneath their small poncho. "Who is that?"

Sakura briefly turns around to show Botan Sasori's sleeping face, cheek pressed against her shoulder, and when she faces them again, Botan has raised a finger in front of their lips. If Sasori was awake right now, she'd use the chance to compare their faces, no doubt finding similar eye shapes. "Shuuya."

It's Gai's loud, lively voice that brings her out of her thoughts, and Lee stifles a laugh at her surprised expression. "Sakura, I wouldn't have expected you to be here."

"Huh?"

"Babysitting is usually reserved for D-Rank, Sakura-san." Lee chips in beside her, and Sakura feels suddenly that familiar sense of annoyance whenever she was around him for too long.

"Very noble of you!"

Tenten eyes her, posture relaxed, the bench she stands behind supporting her arms, and Sakura knows that she doesn't need to verbalise her comment - her face tells it all.

 _Tsunade's apprentice doesn't have anything better to do?_

Maybe it was the unintentional provocation that sparks Sakura's simmering anger, but her raised voice manages to draw in the attention that she didn't ask for. _If only you knew. How fucking dare you._

"He's mine."

"Yours?" Tenten's got that suspicious eye locked into place, and Lee gasps loudly.

"Your kid, Sakura-san?!"

"Yes." she frowns. "What's it to you?"

Lee's uncomfortable now, his big eyes avoiding to meet hers, and Sakura in her all-consuming impulse dares him to look at her again. Tenten cuts in before he can say anything however, inattentive to Sakura. "Lee, you should go home before meeting up with Sai, later."

Lee blinks at her, before perking up again, smiling. "Yeah, thanks Tenten! See you later, Gai-sensei!" He waves, before rushing away to wherever he lived.

It's not until Gai rolls past her, Botan clinging to his chest for security, that she realises Lee isn't the only one to leave. Botan has their face buried into said chest, and Gai beams up at her. "I'm happy for you, Sakura! Make sure to send him to me when he's old enough to run his laps."

Gai grabs the hand that isn't holding onto Sasori, and gives it a firm shake. "Make sure to drop by more often! I'm sure Shuuya would love the dogs."

"Ah, sure." A beat. His words are oddly reassuring to her. "Thank you, Gai-sensei."

Tenten tells Gai that she's staying for a moment, and when they're out of the duo's sight, Sakura speaks. "What's up with them?"

"Oh, I don't know." Tenten replies, her chocolate brown eyes showing no warmth whatsoever. Her tons drops. "I would be pretty avoidant too if someone I trusted and cared for had sleep darted and left me to rot on freezing enemy territory, you know."

Before Sakura can snap back, however, Sasori squirms in her arms and Tenten has left her side already, calling out for Gai.

When she comes to her senses, the sun has started to set, and the playground is significantly emptier - deadly quiet almost.

* * *

Months pass. As the days begin to grow colder, her routine becomes more natural to her, and as Sasori's speech develops into more coherent sounds, she begins to look forward to holding proper conversation with him.

Neither Tenten nor Lee crossed her paths, despite being legally adopted by Gai, thus living in the big farm house just a bit outside of Konoha- and she's not sure if she even _wants_ to see them, Tenten's harsh comment burned into her mind every time she so as much entertains the idea. It wasn't untrue what Tenten referred to, but the thought of Lee telling her such was even more upsetting to her.

It occurs to Sakura that her anxiety had done little to temper with her mouth.

She's visited that house with Sasori here and then, mainly to forward the reports to Kakashi, who had fallen temporarily ill, instead of giving them to Shikamaru. Kakashi agreed that it would be safer this way, and Gai used the opportunity to gift Sakura whatever Botan grew out of when she went back home. Gai hadn't mentioned anything about the incident, and Sakura wasn't sure whether he knew at all.

Yamato briefly returned during those months too, but she wasn't allowed insight on what he's seen or heard. Most of the time he summarized the reports for her, and made sure Kakashi wasn't working to begin with.

Sakura went out with Sasori more often, despite choosing more secluded places. It was safer this way, and she found that she prefered the quiet. It was a change, she thought at first.

No, Sakura wasn't sure if anything had changed from her domestic isolation at all, the few people she kept in contact with notwithstanding.

Sakura regards her reflection in the small bathroom mirror, her braided hair fastened in one hand while the other holds a pair of scissors. It's too long now, she thinks, tedious to maintain. When her familiar, slightly curled bob comes back into view, Sakura feels she's regained a true part of herself again. Though it's more neat than her wild haircut from when she was 15, her bangs not parted in the middle but instead towards the side, it was still just _her_ in many ways.

Holding the rest of the braid, Sakura exists the bathroom to throw it away, picking strands of long pink hair off her mint green sweater and white ankled pants. She'd have to keep Sasori at home today, and the thought only mildly unsettles her, the other idea of just bringing him to the grocery store with her only to be stared at and possibly touched far more uncomfortable to think about. She liked to tell herself that it wasn't her fear of judgement, a leftover taste from the empty playground, but Sakura had always been bad at well-delivered fibs.

Sasori's leaning against the couch, his small hands desperately trying to cling to something to help him stand, and Sakura crouches next to him to assist him in his heroic task.

He isn't able to hold it for more than approximately three seconds, his stubby legs still far too weak to attempt such a stunt, but the effort put into it makes her smiles all the same.

"Careful, Sasori. Next thing I know you'll be cartwheeling off the bed and break all your front teeth."

The baby stares at her in wonder, and Sakura hopes she hasn't just jinxed it.

"I have to go get us food, today." She helps Sasori sit again, and he's still staring at her with his big brown droopy eyes. "Think you can make it on your own?"

Sasori's face twists in what somewhat resembles a pout, and Sakura can't blame him for the reaction. He doesn't cry when she leaves for the hospital once a week, but at this stage he doesn't really have anyone else to talk to, and he's developed an attachment so strong he hated being left alone when she _was_ there.

Sakura moves to sit the same way Sasori is, her legs loosely draped around his body, and adjusts the collar of his light grey jumper. "Before I go, I think it's only fair that we practise this again."

She claps her hands together making sure Sasori was looking at her face, specifically her mouth, before she speaks. "Repeat after me: Aunt Sakura."

Sasori is wildly confused at her endeavor but his mouth begins to move, attempting to imitate her. "A-...ma."

"Not Mama." She takes his small hands into her own, and it helps keeping his attention on her. She smiles in reassurance. "Aunt Sakura. Auntie"

Sasori smiles back at her. "Ama"

Sakura sighs. _He's due for his nap, anyways._

When Sasori's finally shushed to sleep, Sakura's stuffed toy accompanying him to the land of dreams, Sakura finds courage to leave the house.

* * *

Sakura's glad for having picked the first and not the second option, because any claustrophobe would have taken flight just looking at how utterly packed the streets were today, Shinobi and civilians alike clamouring for the best prices from absolutely unapologetic vendors.

Such is Konoha's market culture.

She adjusts the bag slung around her arm, filled with the necessaries that didn't require to be bought fresh in bulk - she's hoped she could get fruits and vegetables for cheaper prices here. The people around her are loud, a palette of emotions dipped into the late afternoon sun flickering across various faces of all ages, ranging from joy in being gifted toys to anger in being ripped off by a stand whose neighbour had offered the same bag of rice but for half the price.

Sakura navigates through the crowd, making sure she wouldn't bump into anyone, brushing off any odd looks likely due to her infamously pink hair. She could have taken the rooftops, but the streets were narrow, and the overview limited. She makes a beeline for the fruit stand when she spots it, which she knew was run by an elder lady that her father used to get along with well. The woman spares her a soft smile, and she returns it, pointing to the various items before packing them up.

She gives the bag to the vendor to weighting and in doing so, her front bumps against one of the baskets, a few of the apples and oranges spilling onto the floor. Sakura blanches, and the woman reassures her that no harm was done.

Sakura exhales the breath she didn't know she was holding in.

"It's my fault, let me pay for this."

Before she can crouch to scoop the fruits back into her other bag, another voice cuts in.

"Let me help."

Sakura looks up to see an unfamiliar male figure crouching in front of her, moving to put the fruits tumbling his way into her bag, a smile gracing his handsome face. She notes the forehead protector tied around his head, and concludes that he couldn't have been older than her. Granted, she hasn't received any sort of attention outside of her routine, so the offered help is a welcoming change.

"Uhm, thank you." She's feeling flustered at the action, no doubt that her face was sporting a soft blush. The shinobi doesn't reply, just continues to smile, and the expression reminds her eerily of Sai. _Former root?_

It's not until she's thanked him again standing up, and turns her back, that he speaks.

"Whore."

Sakura stops in her tracks, her ears ringing, and her fists react faster than her mind does, sending the boy in question _flying_ into another stand.

And it's not until he screams in pain that she processes the panic around her, other shinobi trying to calm the commotion while other vendors hurl indignations at each other. It's not until then that the cautious glances and open stares make sense to her, the hushed whispers and hurled insults clashing against her ears all together. Sakura suddenly finds it difficult to breathe, and swallows the urge to cry.

Amongst the chaos, a hand grabs her to drag her out of the crowd, and Sakura's eyes sting with tears, seeing the tough faced Ino Yamanaka for the first time in years.

"I'll pay for it."

* * *

It's not until the door to Sakura's apartment door is closed and locked, that Ino speaks. Her boots and charcoal coat are left at the entrance, and she looks so much smaller without them.

Sakura finds that the muted greys suit her better than bright blues.

"What were you thinking?!" Her arms cross, and Sakura doesn't check to see if Ino was eyeing her figure slumped over the table. She snorts.

"So you're part of the Intelligence Division now?"

"Sakura" Ino sighs, and Sakura can relate just barely to her frustration. The sound of chairs scraping against the wooden floor tells her that Ino joins her at the small table. "Answer the question. You nearly killed the guy."

Sakura shoots her a glare, but Ino is unfazed by the action. The _guy_ crosses her vision briefly, and she remembers that all she saw was red at that moment.

"Have you heard what he called m-"

"I have, actually." Ino folds her hands on the table, her posture relaxed. "People are talking about you, Sakura. Have been, ever since you set back foot into this village."

Sakura snorts, and she brings up the strength to raise her head, body leaning against the chair. "Oh, they are?"

"Yes." Ino's lip curls. "What were you thinking, agreeing to be stuck here for who knows how many years as a single mother of a foreign bastard and thinking it will go well?"

 _Ouch._

She didn't have to be so upfront about it.

"Is it even yours?"

"What, of course he is-"

"That's the same bullshit you told Temari."

Sakura suddenly feels the need to sleep. Her eyes sting again, and she scoff comes out choked. "How did you know?"

"You were always a bad liar." Ino cracks her knuckles, and her gaze meets Sakura's directly. "This time you really dug your own grave with it."

"Is this why our friends avoid me?" She resists the urge to wipe her incoming tears, as that would only make it worse.

"Nobody knows where you have been or what you did during those past two years. To them, anything is possible." Ino's expressions softens, and she drapes her hand over Sakura's. "I can help you if you want."

Looking back on it, Sakura can't tell what compelled her to get angry at Ino's words. Was is because Ino didn't trust her to handle it on her own?

 _Careless._

Sakura slaps the hand folded over her own away from her person, and her words flush out like venom. "I don't need your help."

It's still now, Ino's face melts blank, and Sakura's eyes widen.

"That's right. You don't need my help."

"Wait, I-"

"You know what I realised during the time you were gone? That I don't need it, either." Ino stands up, but her composure is eerily collected. "Where even were you when my father died?"

"Ino-"

"What did you do when I was told about Asuma's faith?" Her bitter smile is so unlike her. "Nothing. That's what you did."

Sakura can't bear to look Ino in the eyes anymore, so Ino slams her hands on the table, effectively scaring the tears out of her eyes-

"I made a mistake, Sakura." Ino begins, and Sakura collects the courage to meet her gaze. - but there is no comfort in Ino's scrutiny. "I chased after you, when Sasuke left - but you didn't deserve it. Temari showed me that I was nothing more to you than a pitiful comfort fuck. During the war, all you ever thought about this entire time was yourself."

The force knocks her chair onto the floor, but she wasn't just going to take what Ino threw her way that easily.

"You know that isn't true-"

"It is.. I'm not the first and not the last person you disappointed."

Lee's face flashes before her, and she grits her teeth. _Useless._

A cry pierces through the air, signaling to Sakura that Sasori must have been awake, and Ino brows knit, frowning.

"We're over, Sakura. I have a clan to succeed, and an Intelligence Unit to lead. Do whatever you fucking want, now."

It's dark outside when Ino slams the door behind her, and Sasori's cry doesn't stop until Sakura holds him against her, slumped against the wall. Her body's still shaking, and she struggles to get her breathing under control, her tears blurring her vision-

But Sasori doesn't care about that.

"Mama."

Her tears halt, and she looks at him in surprise. The word tumbles out of his small mouth over and over again, and he squeals in glee over his achievements, his brown eyes shining in joy.

 _That's right_ , she thinks, a weak smile passing her lips. _He's too young to understand her-_

He won't leave her.

"It's alright, Sasori." She lets out a short laugh, embracing his shared warmth. It was just them, now.

It's not like she could tell anyone anymore, anyways.

* * *

A/N: I tried to post this last Thursday, but I got FFXV LOL. This chapter is the one I had the least amount of notes for, too. :~( Finally we're getting to the interesting stuff! I'll try to get another one out before Christmas, but no promises! Thank you everyone for leaving comments, it's a great motivation!

P.S I used they pronouns for Botan, so I hope that wasn't all too confusing.

And to the lovely anon who thought this was going to be a happy housewife babysitting fic: Should have checked the 2 year old AU post on my Tumblr first :~)


	4. Long Long Road

_Fire was swallowing the village around her, charcoal smoke obscuring the many corpses littering the streets._

 _She barely makes out the screams of Chiyo amongst many others. She can feel the toxin numbing her system, the pain from the sword dug deep into her abdomen overwhelming her senses._

 _Blood._

 _There was so much blood._

" _Wh-where is he?" She can feel her mouth fill with the taste of metal, and it slurs her speech, but there was no one to jump in her place, no one to come to her aid._

 _She spits not red, but purple._

 _There was no antidote this time, and as she gathers the lasts of her strengths to face her attacker-_

 _She's met with an empty shell._

" _Pointless"_

* * *

Sakura awakes with a start, and barely she registers the child beside her jolting at the action. She can't seem to calm her rushing heartbeat, and her body is covered in sweat, no doubt that she'd have to wash the futon again.

Another nightmare.

When Sakura looks to her right, Sasori is sitting there, clutching his worn-out stuffed bear, a startled look adorning his face. She glances at the digital clock she's brought from the bedroom into the living room, and groans at the ridiculously early hour.

"Why are you awake at 5?"

Sasori, at the tender age of four, just shrugs in reply.

Sakura gathers the willpower to raise from her makeshift bed, her appearance no doubt an utter mess, and she looks at him apologetically.

"Did I scare you?"

"...Yes."

His voice is so quiet, so unassuming, that it only helps fastening the guilt.

"Come here." Sakura gestures to her lap, and Sasori comes, the two of them meeting a warm embrace. She buries her nose into his red hair, and it calms her. "Sorry."

"It's okay, Mama." Sakura can feel the child relaxing in her arms, and she's glad for it. It's not the first time he's seen her like this.

She musters him for a moment, his eyes droopy as ever, but there is no sign of fatigue.

"How long have you been awake?" She yawns, and he imitates her subconsciously. He's hesitant, but eventually he replies.

"A while."

Sakura resists to roll her eyes at his mysterious endeavour. She sees the backpack peeking out from the bedroom, an unsuccessful attempt on his side to bring it into the living room, and boops his nose.

"You excited about our trip, today?"

Sasori's eyes shine, and it makes Sakura smile. "Alright, let's have breakfast so we can get ready after."

Sasori is quick to jump off her person, and he rushes back into the bedroom, nearly tripping over the bag in the process. Sakura sighs, and stretches her stiff limbs.

She didn't have the space for another bed, but she could invest in another mattress instead.

It's cold in her apartment, the heater not turning on for another hour, and the chill makes her bare legs shiver when she opens the fridge. Sakura takes out the onigiri she's prepared the night before, hoping that Sasori wasn't opposed to a cold breakfast this morning, and when she turns around with the plate in her hand, Sasori's already sitting at the table, his eyes focused on the pages of one of her lengthier novels.

They didn't have a TV, and since there wasn't much else to do until Sasori went into the academy, she discovered his passion for gathering knowledge, matching her's down to a T - So they often went to the library, picking out whatever Sasori was interested in at the moment, ranging from stories about underdogs and princesses to the various non-fiction she already had in her apartment.

During the past couple years Sakura's learned to live with their- their _arrangement_ , if you could call it that. The villagers didn't dare to mouth a single word while Sasori was around (Did they develop a sense of respectability for not bullying children anymore? Touché), and she's learned to ignore whatever was thrown her way when he wasn't around. She occasionally saw some familiar faces crossing her path, but little - if nothing - was usually said on both parties. She doesn't meet up with Kakashi or Shizune either, unless it was to check on Sasori's health, or pass those reports forward.

Sakura glances at the cabinet where she knew her various medications are hidden behind coffee tins, some to combat the headaches she doesn't use her chakra to quell, others she's prescribed herself not to long ago, ranging from sleeping pills to antidepressants. She wonders if she should pack a few, but she's been doing a pretty good job not letting Sasori see her take them so far.

It is a lonely life she's leading - but she liked to tell herself that she's become accustomed to it.

"What's Sunagakure like?"

Sakura looks up from her scrolls in surprise, swallowing the chunk of rice she's been chewing. "Sunagakure?"

Sasori nods, placing his empty plate in front of him to present her the book he started earlier. "The books said it's very mysterious"

Sakura stares at the cover, - a fictional love story set around the reign of the second Hokage -, and coughs into her hand. _Hopefully this wasn't the explicit version. "_ It's big and, well" she fumbles for the appropriate description, but Suna always had a knack for being just - _boring_ in comparison to other villages. "There's a lot of sand?"

Sasori scrunches his eyebrows together, and Sakura resists the urge to giggle at the _unfortunately adorable_ face in front of her. "Maybe one of the people we travel with is from Suna, and you can ask them." She says, leaning over the table to pinch his cheek. "You'll see when we're there."

"Okay, Mama."

* * *

The sun is barely up when she closes the door to their apartment and exit the building, and naturally, no one's around to send her smiles (they were rare, but the elderly in this building seemed more mellow than the ones she encounters on the market) nor frowns at the image of her in her shinobi get-up, clutching the hand of a toddler who barely manages to reach her waist. She touches her red headband lightly, hoping the tear - she was at fault for - was sewn together tightly enough to withstand another two weeks of travel. Sasori's clothes are held in muddy colors, the garment comfortable enough to assure he wouldn't freeze in the woods nor suffer a heat stroke in the sand. A bounce accompanies his step, and excitement is written all over his face, an expression she's never thought she'd see on the formerly deceased criminal.

Sakura had never asked Chiyo about specific details regarding Sasori's past - but she wonders whether his childhood had already been drastically different at this step.

"Remember, Shuuya." She slouches in her step when they near the gates, making sure the child was able to hear her. "Don't reveal your nickname to them."

 _It was special,_ they had agreed one evening, listening in to the rain pattering against the window. More than anything, it was a safety precaution that she was glad Sasori was able to hold onto at the age of four. Technically, she wasn't even allowed to use that name on him, but she hasn't been able to shake it off ever since she's first seen him in Orochimaru's lab.

 _Better if Gaara doesn't find out about this._

It isn't, however, the thought of what _could_ go wrong on such a long journey after being confined to Konoha's inner walls for the most part, but the anxiety of _who_ was assigned to travel with her, since they couldn't just organise a heap of ANBU whether she stepped one foot out of Konoha's territory. It isn't that Sakura wasn't capable of defending herself - which she very much was, _thank you_ \- but she's never fought a number of thieves and bandits while a small child was clinging to her waist, and the mere fear of anything happening to _Sasori_ , anything that she's at fault for, well-

She hoped they wouldn't assign her Shikamaru.

But karma's a bitch, and she's especially fond of one Sakura Haruno.

Sakura doesn't falter in her step when she recognizes the familiar blondes conversing, but her eyes widen just the tiniest bit. She knew Temari would be travelling with her, but she's hoped she wouldn't have to see Naruto for, well, another three years. Worse off, Sai decided for whatever reason to tag along, too.

 _Just my fucking luck._

"What are you doing here?" The remark is faster out than she'd have liked it to be, but she isn't exactly able to ignore him at this point, either.

"Oh, Sakura-chan!" Naruto's facial expressions has always left little to the imagination, but it's never had such a direct focus to Sakura, and she could have sworn he flinched hearing her voice - but the frown smoothes out into another one of his trademark smiles. "Kakashi-sensei asked us to protect Temari. We're going to see Gaara, too! "

Temari's closed fan hits Naruto's side in an instant, and he's but a click of her tongue is all she leaves to comment on. It's not until the situation resolves that Sakura notices Sai staring at the child clinging to her legs, uncomfortable with part of the attention being drawn to him. He's seen Sasori before, but Sai has always been nothing but a mysterium, keeping quiet when his aid was needed, and opening his mouth in the worst of situations. Even his prolonged exposure to Naruto and herself did little to fix that - so Sakura actually didn't know what he thought of the entire arrangement just yet.

Sai draws away his gaze when she narrows her eyes at him, and he turns around to help Naruto fasten his backpack.

"We're going a different route this time, so I hope all of you leaf shinobi prepared for it." Temari says. "Should take about 5 days, if nothing happens in between."

"Any possible signs of threat we should look out for here?" Sakura asks, the tight grip on her hand indicating that Sasori is tense.

"I don't know about river country, but I doubt there'd be anything to attack us, anyways." Temari replies, strapping her fan back onto her back. She didn't bring as much to travel with her as the rest of the group, but she's travelled far more than Sakura has, so she doesn't seem to be concerned about it, either.

"Ready?" Temari asks, and Sakura nods.

"Sure, lead the way."

It's not until they leave the gates of Konoha behind them, that Sasori relaxes just a little bit.

* * *

"Kid's grown so big." Sakura's briefly pauses running her fingers through Sasori's hair, one of the more successful attempts for the child in her lap to be lulled to sleep, only to come face to face with Temari walking towards her, her pigtails down and her equipment left next to Naruto's campfire site, abandoned."I can't believe it's been four years, already. Time flies."

"I suppose it does." Sakura spares Temari a smile, noticing that Sasori's fallen asleep. It wasn't easy, travelling with a child so long, but they weren't in a hurry to get to Suna just yet, so the team opted out of the trees for the ground. She's had to carry him on her back for a while, but nothing that would actually exhaust her in the process. Her gaze wanders from Temari, who chooses to sit next down to her, to Sai's sleeping figure, and she concludes that little around them actually changed within those years - not even Naruto's awful haircut.

Well, excluding her self-deprecating state of isolation, that is.

She _is_ about to scold herself for the thought when Temari's voice cuts sharp into the void silence of the night.

"Oi, Naruto. Don't use the hawke if you want to send around your love letters."

Sakura hasn't even noticed that Naruto's arrival from his guard post, but Naruto spots her, and the small scroll he's holding in his hand goes behind his back in a hush, flustered by the duo's attention on him. The fire is weaker now, and he's standing too far away for her to properly judge, but he's definitely caught in the act. Temari, to his inconvience, acts smug about it.

"Who's the lucky recipient?"

Naruto, well, she's glad he seems composed enough to not alert the entire animal population of their stay. "They're not love letters." He feigns an indignant look as he tries to tuck the scroll in back of his pants. "Don't worry about it."

Temari snorted at the man's childish lack of response. "What else would be so important that you would have to hide it like that? Unless you're involved with criminal activity, in which case we should probably take a look anyway."

Naruto's forehead crinkled as his brows furrowed before he gave an exasperated sigh. "It's not that, I just need to let Sasuke know tha-" He quickly cut himself off, realizing his mistake.

"Sasuke? You're in contact with Sasuke?"

Now that's a name she hasn't spoken aloud in a good while.

"Yeah I-" His reaction almost mirrors the one the one he had in the Hokage tower, and Sakura's suddenly surrounded by a sense of deja-vu. "So I know that he's okay. He-" A beat. "I'm keeping Kakashi-sensei informed about Sasuke's mission."

Now Naruto wasn't the best when it came to delivering well-thought fibs - better than her, still - and his vague stutterings leave her more to question than to answer. She didn't even care that someone outside of their village was sitting right next to them. "Mission? What mission?"

A mission so important that he's been absent from the village for nearly 5 years?

Naruto sits down on his sleeping bag, not too far from her, actually, and his eyes avoid her's. "Kakashi-sensei told me not tell anyone."

Naruto didn't know that she frequented Kakashi's place more than she dropped by the Hokage tower, so she'd know if Sasuke was involved in anything beneficial to the village without having to go into detail about it - but the name's never even escaped Kakashi's lips, and Naruto's explanation could very well be a blatant lie.

It's not like she hasn't been keeping secrets, secrets that are - in the literal sense - clinging to her person, right now. Secrets that have ruined her standing in the village, secrets that she was bound not to reveal for the sake of avoiding a diplomatic bloodbath. But it wasn't really the mission itself she cared about-

It makes her angry, actually, that Naruto doesn't seem to trust her with information about a beloved teammate.

 _Nothing's changed, you'll never be a part of this team._

"You don't want me to pry into your matters, is that it?"

Naruto gulped, grasping at words to fill the silence. Instinctively, he walks towards the pinkette, stuttering out a response. "It's not like that. Sakura, please just-"

Sakura fights herself to keep her expression neutral, but her quiet voice quivers. "What does he need to know, Naruto?"

Before he has a chance to respond, Temari cuts them off in a harsh tone, "Sakura, leave it."

Sakura was shaking in a mixture of anger and fear, but she doesn't hesitate in repeating her question. "What does he need to know?"

"Hag, you're going to wake up your brat at this point." Sakura doesn't even have to turn her head to know Sai was smiling in her direction, whether he woke up from her outburst or not, and the sheer will not to give him what he deserves - a blue eye, maybe two - prevents her from putting Sasori aside to walk over to the other side of the camp.

"I-" Naruto's eyes flitter between the shinobi, until he seems to resign completely, emitting a sigh. "He's…he asked about Konoha."

Sakura doesn't know what prompts her to believe that Naruto was lying on that one too, but her body insists that familiar feeling of distrust, the same gut-wrenching feeling she had back in Orochimaru's lab.

Discomfort.

"Did he ever even ask about me, Naruto?" The syllable of his name that she used pronounce so fondly escapes her in a hiss, and the image of Team 7 in her mind, the second family she's had since childhood - it's clouded by doubt.

Naruto sends her this look - big, apologetic blue eyes - and she doesn't have to hear the words to know she won't like the answer.

"Mama." Sasori's sleepy voice drawls through her anger, and Naruto turns away from her person to return to his seat.

"Alright, that's enough." Temari stretches her stiff limbs, and glares into the round, obviously displeased by the drama that wasn't going to go anywhere anytime soon. "Sai, you're on shift for the next three hours. Wake me up when you're through with that."

Sakura narrows her eyes at Naruto's back, but he leaves little inquiry. Her arms scoop around Sasori to help him up, and she fastens her kunai holster around her thigh.

"We're going on a walk."

"Go ahead."

* * *

They're still in fire country, she can tell. A day and a half away from river country, judging by the plants and herbs left in the territory. She knew the people of Suna prefered the stars as a source of navigation, but because Fire country had the luxury of vast greenery, Sakura liked to use the ground as guidance.

Sakura is also glad for the trees and bushes, masking her presence, effectively not having to deal with her group - She's hoped Sasori hadn't been the entire time.

"Sasori, look at this." He crouches beside her, his face filled with curiosity. The moonlight isn't that strong tonight, filtered by the trees, but it still helps her to identify the herb before her. Carefully, she plucks the plant with her gloved hand and twirls it between her fingers. "Do you recognize it?"

Sasori face scrunches up in concentration, before he speaks. "Cananga….something."

"Cananga odorata _"_ She ruffles his hair with her other hand, noting his melancholia, as if he had disappointed her. "You almost had it, don't worry. Do you know what it's used for?"

"It's supposed to... combat fever?" His voice is meek, and she smiles at him in reassurance.

"That's correct." She opens a pack of small tissues, and proceeds to press the plant into the cotton for preservation. "It's can also lower blood pressure. This herb in particular can only be found blooming at night."

Sasori's mouth forms into an O, and when she gives him the okay, he touches the leaves gently. "Is it rare?"

"Kinda. As a medical ninja, you might never know when and where you have to use it, so it's wise to pick the herbs you find on your way."

He nods in understanding. It's amazing, she thinks, how capable he was in processing this information at a young age. It also reminded her of herself a little, back when she was obsessed with getting into the academy, using the time she didn't spend with Ino hiding behind big books in the unpopulated sections of the library.

"Do you need it for antidotes?" Sasori asks, his droopy eyes focused on the tissue in her hand while his hands were picking grains from the soil under him.

Sakura is surprised at the sudden question, her mind already working to remember when she's worked with it in Suna's greenhouse, when she was 15.

"I've used it only once, as far as I remember." Sakura begins, hesitant in her answer. "The patient was poisoned severely, and I had to make up an antidote on the spot."

She's neglecting to mention that the toxin in question was in fact from the boy in front of her, the one that sadistically gave your immobile body three days to torture itself before it would attack the brain, frying your nerves from the delirious fever, leaving you to an utmost painful death. Sakura shakes her head to clear her mind of the thought, and Sasori tilts his head at her in confusion.

Looking at the sweet child, handling the the world around him with such care, she doesn't want to think about how many lives he had taken with that poison.

Fortunately for her, Sasori doesn't seem to be interested in prying the subject further. She looks at his small hands, dirty from the ground, and sighs.

"It's late. Let's wash your hands and go back."

* * *

The cold is what rips her out of her dreamless sleep, and when she pats around the empty space next to her, her eyes are open in alarm.

The dent of the child's reclining body hasn't gone cold yet, but Sasori himself wasn't where he was supposed to be, and she can't spot a puff of red hair in the bushes around them.

Sakura trains her ears for any noises when she doesn't see anyone but her sleeping teammates in the early morning hour, and when she makes out the rustling of leaves nearby, she quickly fumbles for her kunai to rush after the noise. She arrives at a clearing when she spots a cloaked figure, Sasori hoisted in their arms.

It's by a scant inch that she misses Kabuto's ugly face.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." He spins the kunai around in his hand, before throwing it away, hitting a tree trunk. "You nearly finished the job for me."

Sakura doesn't move from where she's standing, her body quaking in pure rage, and she grits her teeth. Kabuto uses the hand that wasn't holding Sasori to draw back his hood, revealing the cracked white skin he's kept since their last encounter. His eyes are an ugly shade of yellow when he musters her, and she screams at herself not to act irrationally on the spot, not being able to predict what it'd do to Sasori.

It's a nightmare.

"What, aren't you happy to see me? I'm just as capable of informing you on his development as the slug princess' other apprentice." He smiles, and his filed teeth show.

Sakura didn't even care enough to question him on how he knew about this particular detail in her routine, her nails digging deep into her bare palms, drawing blood. Her voice is frigid. "What do you want with him?!"

"Since you already foiled my plan, I might as well tell you." He begins, and the cheery tone of his voice makes her shudder. "Tell me, Sakura. Have you ever heard what snapping a child's neck sounds like? It's not different from a bird's, or so I've been told."

Her face pales, and he emits a laugh in response, Sasori sleeping in his arms ever so soundly.

It made her sick, feeling this utterly useless.

"Oh, I would have done it, if it weren't for you." A beat. "Our... _experiments_ haven't turned out the way Orochimaru-sama expected them to, and he's tasked me to go fetch the one successful DNA implant. I have come here to do my mentors bidding, but on the way I've thought that I quite didn't agree with it."

Her hand itches for another kunai, but she knew she wouldn't be fast enough, and that he wasn't hesitant to kill children. Her tone quivers in anxiety. "Just let him go."

"I'll ask you another question, Sakura." He strokes Sasori's cheek in a mocking manner, and Sasori nuzzles his hand into it.

She wanted to scream.

"Have you ever been imprisoned, denied the luxury of water, the warmth of sunlight, tortured until you lost all sense of time, and until you pleaded for mercy at the hands of your attacker?" Kabuto's hand moves from Sasori's cheek to ghost over his neck, and she's at a loss for words, her eyes fixed on his pale fingers for the smallest of movement. "I was quite disappointed that you killed him before me, given the nature of your person. I never found out how you did it, but I don't care to know, either. It was quite the trouble for Orochimaru-sama to undo all the brainwashing, so we figured it was only appropriate to return the favor at the bridge, that day."

His voice is so light, so neutral, as if he talked about the weather - and it's what scares Sakura more than his words do.

Kabuto removes his hand from Sasori's neck, and Sakura softly releases the breath she didn't realise she was holding in. "I wanted to kill him myself, but now that you found me, I'm afraid there is nothing holding you or your little group back from spilling in front of the council, and by extension, my master." His fingers rest on Sasori's head, blue chakra glowing from his tips. "What a shame."

Her throat feels dry, and her voice croaks, when she finally manages to speak. "You don't have to do this anymore. This isn't the same Sasori you've known years ago."

"I figured that you wouldn't understand, being from that pathetic excuse of a village." The glow on his fingers disappears, and Sasori squirms in his sleep. "You Konoha shinobi were always prone to giving men that don't deserve it second chances."

Her feet move on her own accord, and she begins to walk towards him, carefully. Maybe she could grab Sasori before he did anything reckless.

To her horror, Kabuto turns around, facing the stream leading into river country. "I have no trouble, however, orchestrating an accident, should you spill even one drop to the council."

She's at his side faster than he registers, trying to snatch the child from him before it's too late - but he's already loosened his grip, letting Sasori fall into the water. Uncaring to Kabuto's presence, she jumps into the stream, fumbling to catch Sasori's hand in the midst of the dark river, and struggles to locate his screams amongst all the noise crashing in on her.

By chance, her hand comes in contact with his wrist, drawing his body close. Her eyes scan her surroundings as quickly as possible, her view obscured by the waves, until she locates a thicker branch, stuck between a rock and a small batch of ground. Weighted down by the child that she's draped one arm around, she grits her teeth and navigates her body to the right, closing in on the rock, flinching when her back slams against it, turned around to assure that Sasori wouldn't be caught by the impact. Water splashes into her face, and she makes sure to raise Sasori higher than her, assuring that he wouldn't drown. Her muscles are aching, and she feels her stamina depleting.

 _Hold on!_

It's a miracle that she manages to grasp onto the branch with one arm, pulling herself closer to the shore, turning around to lift Sasori's upper body on it.

When she finally feels the grass between her bruised fingers, her breath struggles to calm itself between heavy coughs and the sharp pain in her lungs.

She drags herself over to Sasori, who's laying in the grass, facing away from her. She hovers over him, and she notices that his eyes are closed.

"Sasori?"

He doesn't respond, and when her tinted green fingers touch his chest, his lungs doesn't appear to be responding either.

 _He isn't breathing!_

Quickly she turns him around on his back, situating her both of her hands on his chest, and begins to switch between reproducing his breathing patterns through the pressure of her hands on his chest and breathing her own air into his lungs.

"Fuck." She curses, her eyes stinging with tears. "Come on!"

He remains unresponsive.

 _Think, Think, Think, Sakura._

Some kind of medic, she is.

Suddenly, the image of Akatsuki lair within River Country flashes before her eyes, and the pain pulsing in her back - as if someone slapped it with concentrated force - makes them widen.

That's it!

It's as if her hands move on her own when she pulls him into a sitting position, his head leaning against her chest, and his body slumped forward. She situates her hand on his back, and shuts her eyes in prayer.

"Please let this work, Lady Chiyo."

Her hand hits pressure point between his lungs, and as if she had awoken him from a genjutsu, he reacts instantly, wheezing heavily.

It takes him several moments to speak, but hearing his croaked voice surprises her all the same. "Mama?"

Looking back on it, she scolds herself for her panicked behavior that overwhelmed her rational medical thoughts - That it was not protocol but pure chance that had kept them from the brink of death.

But that's not on the forefront of her mind as she embraces the child in front of her, not being able to stop herself from babbling words of relievement, and she laughs when he sneezes in return.

"Sakura, are you alright?" The concerned voice of Katsuyu appears next to her, out of her sight.

Sakura flinches where she's laying on the ground, her back undoubtedly in need of medical treatment, and so she's summoned the slug in a flash.

She isn't even sure how far away they were from the group.

"Lady Katsuyu, are you able to get in contact with Naruto? Inform him of our location."

"But-"

"The child is not hurt, Lady Katsuyu. Travelling to Suna is our top priority, right now."

She isn't going to leave an opening for Kabuto one more time.

* * *

The sun has long set when Temari points out the tall gates of Sunagakure in the distance. Her backpack is fastened on her front, Sasori sleeping on her back, his arms draped around her shoulders, exhausted from the past five days.

They were spared any other confrontations, to her luck.

"Home, Sweet, Home." Temari says, and tone lacks the appropriate strength to identify her comment as anything but sarcastic. Sakura couldn't blame her - as an ambassador Temari travelled more and in larger distances than she does, but Wind Country didn't exactly leave the most fascinating of scenery to occupy yourself with.

They passed several guard posts during the day, to her surprise, sand shinobi checking them for any signs of danger or shady intentions. _Intimidating precautions to cover up the quality lack of manpower?_

Kakashi's comment about Suna's current state comes to mind, and she figures she couldn't be too far off.

"I could really use a bath, and a bed." Naruto signs, excited by the thought of a roof over their heads, and Sakura can't help but agree.

"At this time of the day the old geezers are sitting in their bed already, so I'm sure you won't be called into council until tomorrow morning." Temari says, her eyes locked onto Sasori when the word council escapes her mouth.

Sakura wonders whether Temari agreed to the whole arrangement, considering that Sasori attempted to murder her brother, while indirectly being involved in the temporary death of her other brother.

Truth to be told, Sakura isn't sure whether she wanted to talk to Temari about it, their last conversation preceding the catastrophic encounter with Ino. She hasn't told them about Kabuto either, considering that he remained unpredictable in his advances, safe for the threat against her person should Orochimaru find out about it. It surprised her when she gave his words more thought the days after, wondering why Kabuto of all people would defy the wishes of Orochimaru. Then again, he seemed different from the neutral evil that he usually presented, that night, his voice brimming with rage.

It makes her wonder what inclined Kabuto to help the Sand in the first place.

Kankuro awaits them at the gate, a hood drawn over his head, grinning from ear to ear. "Sister and the gang, it's been a while."

Sai raises his hand in silent acknowledgment while Naruto returns the cheery greeting. "Long time no see!"

Temari, on the other hand, ignores his words all together. "Where's Gaara?"

"Still in the tower, he sent me ahead while he finishes his paperwork." Kankuro says, flinching when the part of Temari's fan that's sticking out brushes his side. "That hurt, you know."

"You're a tough guy, I'm sure you can handle it." Temari answers, and from where Sakura is standing, she notices that Temari seemed to be an inch or two above him. "I hope he took care of my plants, at least?"

Kankuro rolls his eyes at his sister's antics.

Naruto, at the mention of Gaara, seemed to show no sign of fatigue. "You know where we'll be staying, Kankuro? I'm going to drop by the tower first."

"I'm sure Gaara has arranged something for you, just ask him." Kankuro replies, rolling his stiff shoulders. Temari has already disappeared behind the gates, and Naruto as well as Sai following her when Kankuro turns his attention away from the blondes.

It was entirely focused on her, instead.

"Are you tired? I can show him around while you take a nap."

 _Of course._

"I'm sure _Shuuya_ needs the rest more than I do." Sakura begins, adjusting her grip on the boy to make sure he wouldn't slide off her. She stares him down. "Just show me the inn."

Kankuro blinks, but eventually turns around, letting her set into motion and follow him into the village. "It's your first time here in like, what? Five years?"

"It's been a while, yeah." She says, making sure Kankuro wouldn't fall out of her line of sight while she looked around. "Six years, actually. I was here with my shishou briefly after the war. I don't think we ran across each other."

It's dark, and the streets were as narrow as she remembered when she last set foot into this place, but Suna had definitely put part of their funds into making the buildings more sturdy. They aren't many people out either, save for the few shinobi she saw mostly concentrated around the walls.

Sasori wasn't awake, but he isn't missing out on anything if she's honest.

"Has Suna undergone any changes during the time?" Sakura asks, more to fill the silence than genuine curiosity.

They turn left at an intersection before Kankuro answers.

"We've improved on the flow of resources and trade, since the amount of bandits in Wind Country thinned out after the war." They come to a stop before a bigger, older house, Kankuro fishing for a key in his pocket, before opening the door and gesturing her inside. "I can tell you the rest inside."

Well, definitely not an inn.

Sakura eyes Kankuro's back warily for a moment, before following suit.

Sasori is still knocked out, - not surprising, considering this was his sleeping time anyway - but she didn't really expect Kankuro to attack them in the first place. The house itself was closer to the tower, in a district that seemed for the higher up, but it's hard to tell at this time of the day. Kankuro doesn't speak until the door is closed behind them and he's fumbled for his flashlight.

"Sorry, don't know if they had any switches in here."

"They? Whose house is this anyway?" Sakura mutters, following Kankuro into what seems to be the entrance room. Kankuro pats the dust on one of the couches off, and gestures her to sit.

"It's yours for the time being. Elder Ebizo insisted on it."

The face of an old man with eyebrows so deep set that she didn't even remember if he had eyes at all comes to mind, and her face visibly reveals her surprise to Kankuro - but he didn't let her pry for more answers when she's settled down the sleeping Sasori next to her, gently.

"As I was saying." Kankuro rests the flashlight between them on the coffee table, and Sakura scoots a bit to the front, so Sasori's face was hidden away from the glare. "We're in the middle of renovating the less technologically beneficial places, but several institutions - the hospital among them - are up to your standards. My little brother accomplished a lot in the last 8 years, actually."

Sakura doesn't really know where Kankuro is going with this, but she opts for silence, anyways.

"Do you know about Suna's history?"

Sakura scoops strands of hair behind her ear, thinking about the knowledge she's gathered through her books and Chiyo - but she isn't sure whether Kankuro was interested in the early history. "I know of the situation surrounding the Third."

"Do you know why my father cooperated with Orochimaru?"

 _I don't know why you're cooperating with him again, to be honest._ She thinks, resisting the urge throw him another bitter comment on her part. "No."

"The disappearance of the Third had long term effects on Suna, and we weren't able to provide the men for missions, so the Wind Daimyo started outsourcing missions to Konoha."

"What?"

"It's the same reason the old farts up there" Kankuro points at the ceiling to make a point. "didn't want to go after Gaara."

Sakura had never been physically present on any private affairs when she's saved Kankuro all those years ago, so the information's unexpected. "Was that the reason you attacked Konoha?"

"You won't see the council admit to it tomorrow, but yeah."

"Is...this the reason you're reclaiming Sasori? Because he started it?" Sakura asks, unsure of herself.

"We're not looking to punish him, if that's what you're asking." Sakura's eyes have adjusted to the darkness pretty well at this point, and she can tell Kankuro's smiling at her. "It's a second chance. Not only for him, but also for us. Sasori's truly the greatest shinobi Suna has ever produced, and we want him to continue Lady Chiyo's legacy."

Sakura thinks back on how well Chiyo has commanded her ten puppets, how she's saved Sakura's life more than once in that fight. She tries to imagine Sasori in her place, - and she can see it.

"It's a long term risk we've taken, but we believe it will be worth it. A lot depends on him."

 _Him_ being the child snuggled into her backside, lost in the land of dreams. A child unaware that the weight of a village was resting on his shoulders. A child who mustn't fail.

"Why are you telling me all of this?" Sakura wonders aloud, uncertain in Kankuro's intentions. He leans forward on the couch, and she makes out the glint in his eyes, although lacking the mischievous thought behind it.

"Like I said, the council won't be telling you this. They're still doubtful towards the entire deal, considering you're from Konoha - but I want him to have that chance."

It's that moment where she realises that Kankuro must have learned a lot from Gaara. Hearing him praise someone who shouldn't have been redempted with such confidence - the depressing thought of giving Sasori away one day makes her feel guilty.

"I have a favour."

"What is it?" Kankuro asks, his eyebrow raised.

"I want you to get me the hospital access card. I need to perform a brain scan."

Kabuto's hand ghosting over Sasori's head was integrated into her mind, and she hopes it had been nothing more than dispelling another sleep jutsu.

Kankuro, to her luck, doesn't question it.

"I have to pick you up anyways, tomorrow. I'll drop by the hospital later."

"If it's possible, make sure nobody finds out." Sakura isn't really comfortable with lying on a regular basis, but circumstances have been forcing her to improve in that department. Staying quiet saves her from explaining it to Temari, later. "It's for my own medical research."

"Sure."

"Thank you."

Kankuro's coughs into his hand for emphasis, but he's neglected to remove the dust in his glove, catapulting him into an unintentional coughing fit.

Sakura resists the urge to laugh.

"Well" Kankuro's face is red from exhausting his lung capacity, and he waves her off at the door. "See you tomorrow."

* * *

The house feels much emptier when he leaves, but he's left her the flashlight, and so she picks up Sasori to find the guest room, leaving her belongings in the entrance room for the mean time. Kankuro wasn't lying about the missing switches, considering this house doesn't seem like it's more than in good condition. It looked bigger on the inside than on the outside, and Sakura - courtesy of her exhaustion - loses count of the amounts of doors she's opened, only to find them empty, or too dark to make any proper judgement. - Couldn't Ebizo have given her a house with updated electricity? She'd have to mention that one to him in the next couple days.

She adjust her grip on the child in her arms to open the first door on the upper floor, and to her relievement, she spots two beds, pushed against the wall. She touches the bedding, and is pleased to find it didn't contain the same dust from the entrance room.

At least they changed the sheets.

Sasori, both of them, are in desperate need of a proper bath, but that would have to wait until later on his part.

After she's settled him down gently and removed his shoes, she grabs a scroll from her pack to set up traps outside of the door that would alert her of foreign chakra presence. _Can't risk another encounter with missing nin that have personal vendetta against their former bosses._ She thinks, making sure the traps were in working order, before exiting the room.

She was pretty sure she's spotted a bathroom on the ground floor down the hall, earlier. Walking down the hollow stairs, she recalls Kankuro's conversation again. His own motive seemed pretty clear to her, and his aim to resocialize a lost soul into society is a noble one - but she hasn't quite figured out what his own gain is. Sakura remembers when she's told Kankuro about the fight with the puppet master, the scars on her waist - present to this day - a constant reminder of the pain she's clenched her teeth through in order to save Chiyo, her brain short of rational thought when she's jumped between an elderly woman one foot into the grave, and man far too gone for his own good. She remembers how his eyes had sparkled when she's described him what little she knew about puppetry, and the dozens she's smashed with her bruised fists.

Sakura hadn't been able to read him when she's told him about what Sasori has done for _her_ with his dying breath, his attempt to make her understand by becoming like _him_ , trusting her with information about the meeting, a chance to face the man they've both seemed to despise.

Sakura knew Kankuro went back to river country to collect puppets among the debris in order to rebuild them - but she's never actually gone back to view the place herself, so she wouldn't know what he's done there.

Kankuro's insistence on her person confuses her less than his infuriation with Sasori himself does, and his eagerness to help someone he hasn't talked to face to face seems less conclusive as if she had done it.

 _An unspoken vow to fix the mistakes of our past? Or risk repeating them?_

Sakura grabs her backpack, assuring that it wouldn't hit her back, as Katsuyu's inflow of chakra isn't as helpful as Tsunade being able to concentrate on the spot directly - It was a slower healing process, but it'd do on the road. Her right hand is grasping the strap tightly while her left was still occupied with the flashlight, making her way down the hallway.

Moreso, Kankuro's last encounter nearly resulted in his death if it hadn't been for her antidote; but what did she know about forgiveness, when she knows someone who's forgiven the entire world.

Her hand blindly fumbles for the first door whose handle reflects the flashlight, lost in her thoughts, unoccupied with the task. - but it's not until she feels the cold air of the drafty room on her skin, and her body hitting against a hollow object, that her consciousness returns to her - and when she flashes said object and comes face to face with the wooden head attached to a string in the ceiling, she would be surprised later if the resulting scream from her person didn't just alert the entire population of Suna.

Whoever was responsible for her misfortune really doesn't want her to find the bathroom - or sleep ever again, for that matter.

* * *

A/N: Ayyyy lmao guess who's back at it again

I honestly love writing the interactions between Sakura and youngster Sasori, and now that he can actually react to it properly I hope I don't have to consistently keep him off-screen anymore. (Honestly, once you actually start writing babies you realise that your selection is p limited.) I do a lot of research on kid's development parallel to writing the scenes, and I'm super shocked on how much they're actually capable of in the toddler stage? Sasori being super smart actually has some realism to it now LOL

This chapter was supposed to be much much longer but I already surpassed the intended count, and I wanted to churn out the next part of the story for you guys before I prepare for my exams until the 14th, so I hope you like it! I hope a few questions that were brought up could be answered here. Next stop: Fun Days In Sand Land


	5. The Meeting

_The war was relentless. Everyday, shinobi and civilians alike hurried to the council to review the names of the fallen and the missing, list after list, some being sent back home while others were led into one of many crematories that his village housed._

 _His own kin hadn't been seen in months._

" _The war may have ended, but the threat remains." He couldn't make out the instructor's face, for it was wrapped in cloth, save for his small beady eyes. A veteran, one the few that made it back alive. "You became Genin to serve this village, to avenge the many shinobi who let their lives down to protect you."_

 _Orphans, that's all we are, he wanted to say, - but the words are stuck in his throat; Whether it was because of the harsh sun, or his own fear, he couldn't pinpoint._

 _The man adjusts his scroll, an order from the Kazekage to gather and train young and ambitious shinobi. "I expect all of you to give your all, no matter the circumstances. Success is an utmost priority."_

 _Eventually, the man's small eyes focus on him, and his own body goes rigid._

 _He didn't ask for this._

" _33-001. Chiyo's brat. Don't expect any favors."_

* * *

"Is this some kind of sick prank?"

"Well, if the rumors are true, some of these old geezers do hold a sadistic streak." Kankuro says, his tone light enough to make her believe that it _is_ a joke - but you never knew with the inhabitants of this village. He's making the last of adjustments to the robe's draped over her everyday cloth, a tradition that the council still valued , - hence the reason that Kankuro himself woke her up 2 hours earlier than intended to help her put them on.

Sakura is still too groggy to crack a funny reply in return, and she wishes that she shared Sasori's talent of taking long fulfilling naps.

"Chiyo's house, though? Really? I nearly died when I bumped into one of those-" _Things_ , she wants to say, but remembers who's standing right next to her. "Puppets."

Nevertheless, she doesn't think she was ever going to get over how creepy puppets were, especially not after nearly _smooching_ one that was missing an eye, of all things, last night.

"Isn't it amazing? Not even my room has this much space for my collection." Kankuro stands behind her as he finishes tying the white cloth over her shoulders, and gives the result a pat as if he just molded clay. "Done."

"You know, an inn would have been just fine." Sakura turns around to inspect his smiling face for any signs of remorse. Sadly, none was to be found.

"Has Sasori seen the room, yet?"

" _Shuuya_ has not, No." She moves past him to enter the kitchen, filling a glass with water to take upstairs. It's usually what would get Sasori out of bed easier, considering that he wasn't normally much of a morning person.

When she enters the living space again, Kankuro is nowhere to be found. _Probably hanging out in that room,_ she thinks. Balancing the full glass in her hand carefully, she makes her way back up the stairs.

She wouldn't even have heard the puppeteer if it hadn't been for her restless sleep; she had yet to adjust to the crass temperature changes of Wind Country, pairing it with her lack of medication and the irregular intervals of pain the wound in her back caused was certainly a recipe for disaster. Sakura stifles a yawn as she spots the room Sasori and her stayed in last night, making sure that the door to the windowless room was in it's previous position (It's not like she didn't trust Kankuro, but you never knew how the child would react to be shaken by a stranger, and she already had the pleasure with Kabuto, _thank you_ ).

Putting the glass of cold water on the night stand behind him, she moves to sit on the edge of the bed, the heavy robes hindering her movements just barely. Drawing the covers back just a little, her voice is soft.

"Sasori."

A small part of her is still shaken from the encounter, her incompetence on her part nearly resulting in the loss of a child's life - it makes her angry, more than anything else. She should report it to the council, to _someone_ \- but she also remembers Kabuto's words, talking about murder with ease, having no trouble in knocking her teammates out, the underlying threat that he would come back-

She can't let that happen.

Movement between her fingers draws her out of her thoughts, and when she comes to sense, Sasori's there, holding the glass out to her.

"You didn't finish." She wonders aloud, taking the glass from him. Sasori nods.

"You have to drink, too."

It's a mark of the effect that he has on her - big hazel eyes, devoid of doubt, a sense of determination swirling in them. She's drawn out of her thoughts one more time when he nudges her fingers with the glass, further urging her to take it. – She blames her sluggish state on her lack of sleep.

"Don't worry, I'm fine."

"I'm not thirsty, anymore."

With how often she tends to space out in recent memory, he probably attributes it to her own lack of sleep. It was laughable how much he began to look out for her.

A simple thank you escapes her lips as she finishes the glass, placing it on the nightstand before she helps him out of his high bed. Arms that couldn't possibly go any higher wrap around her waist, and Sakura envelops him in return.

"Did you sleep well?"

Sasori hesitates, just for a second, before his muffled voice reaches her ears. "Yes, mama."

"It's pretty cold at night, isn't it?", she asks, letting her hand run through his red locks in comfort. A quick assessment tells her that he wasn't outwardly suffering from any after effects of the events in Fire Country, but a thorough test at the hospital later would have to wait, anyway. "Extreme temperature changes are common in Wind, unfortunately."

"Are we going to walk around Suna, today?"

"It depends on how long we're going to stay with the council, later." Sakura replies, a glance at the door revealing to her that Kankuro hasn't returned from his spontaneous trip to the museum this place housed. "Come on, let's get you washed up."

* * *

"...and that is the story on how Gaara and I survived the hottest bowl of Udon that Kumo had to offer." Kankuro finishes, clapping for emphasis, - Sakura had tuned out somewhere between Karui getting sick and C missing his pants.

Sasori however, nods to himself, making sure Kankuro got that little bit of acknowledgment.

Sakura isn't sure whether she should account it to his personality or his upbringing.

"I hope we can visit that place too, someday." He says, navigating the small rocks laid out in the street to make sure he wouldn't trip over his robes.

Maybe she could arrange a trip to the Land of Lightning.

The Kazekage Tower probably remains the only building in Suna that looks to be exactly the same, she thinks, as the shadow of the tall complex begins to loom over their heads. She's always appreciated its rounded structures - no matter how overall dull she finds Suna to be - the longevity of the village a testimony to it's architecture; compared to Konoha's tendency to swallow itself whole, that is.

Sasori's eyes are calculating, probably drinking in the sights and sounds around him, she thinks. The region around the tower was more lively than she remembered it to be, a couple vendors placed around the way, families and the elderly using the tower to navigate their way to the respective districts in the village. It's a contrast to the quietness of the village they've arrived at back when Gaara was kidnapped by the Akatsuki. Sasori wouldn't know, of course, his literary references dating back to when the population of Suna was just about half of what he's seeing here, maybe even more than his former self would have experienced during the war.

A guard sends them a nod of approval as Kankuro waves them through the gates, and she sees Sasori falling back a little to grab her hand as they pass the men and women staring them down. She squeezes his in reassurance, making sure they weren't bound to lose Kankuro out of their sight as quickly as he hurried through several corridors of the rounded building.

"Don't worry, nothing will happen." The corners of her mouth lift a little, in hopes that it'd mask her own nervosity. _To you, that is._

Sasori blinks at her, before returning her smile.

Oh how she wished that they'd be doing sight seeing in Kumo right now.

"Good morning, Kankuro. Sakura-san." Another person, presumably of jounin status, meets them halfway, one of his eyes masked, as she remembered it.

"Baki-san?"

Baki sighs.

"You're not allowed in there Kankuro. Trust me, I tried."

"Wouldn't have expected any less, not since I nearly beat Joseki to a pulp."

"He's still recovering from that-"

"He should be preparing for _retirement-._ "

...Maybe she preferred to being ignored, sometimes.

A small hand nudges her robe, and she looks down to see Sasori's confusion mirroring hers. "What are those men talking about?"

Sakura shrugs, the name Joseki and the memory of Kankuro beating up anyone as unknown to her as it is to the little boy beside her. "People from Suna are weird like that."

His big droopy blink again, before going back to assessing the strange men in front of them "I see."

Out of nowhere, Kankuro grabs her wrist, letting Sasori scurry after them as they're led past Baki in front a big door with the village's seal on it.

"You're on your own in the lion's den. Good luck."

She's definitely not heard the term " _lion's den_ " slip out of his mouth before.

"...Thanks."

* * *

She isn't sure whether they were allowed to stand or sit, but none of the 12 pair of eyes are leaving further inquiry, let alone an invitation, so the two of them-

Contend with standing near the door.

"We will now begin the session, Gaara-sama."

The red-head in question sits at what appears to be the head of the round table, his hands folded in front of his mouth and his usually somber expression stern. Sakura hasn't actually seen Gaara in a little over 3 years, so the change in his posture and attitude surprised her a little. He's always been known to being the more serious one out of the Kage, but the way he carries the atmosphere in the room needs a little getting used to.

Well, that, and his terrible slicked new hairstyle.

As if he could have read her thoughts, Gaara sends her a glance, before ceasing to fold his hands, resting them instead on the table.

"I'm sure you all know." He begins. "Nothing leaves this room. This isn't something to be discussed with other villages over tea."

"Kazekage-sama, with all due respect. This isn't something to be discussed with _Konoha_ , either."

Sakura can't see who the man in question is that would so callously spit the words _Konoha_ out of his mouth, but she's sure she wouldn't want him to see her impending glare, either.

Sasori's hand was still wrapped around hers, and it does help a little to keep her grounded.

 _Protocol, Sakura._

"We place a great deal of trust in Haruno-san and the Hokage, Elder Ryusa. You know that no one else would have succeeded with the chances we took. She's currently the greatest medic after the Slug Princess, and it is an honor to be able to work with experts like her." Gaara replies to the Elder sitting with his back towards her. "We don't have the financial capabilities, either."

"We have enough medics, Kazekage-sama. We could have found someone." Ryusa replies. "Konoha isn't fit to serve our village in times like these."

"Now, Now, Ryusa." Another man pipes up, this time in her line of sight, his furrowed brows a contrast to the smile on his face. He seems to be approaching his 60s from a quick glance. "We've decided on this together, don't be such a wuss."

A grunt is all what Sakura hears from Ryusa himself.

"Thank you, Elder Sajo." Gaara continues, his calculating tone a hint makes her wonder how used he's become to it. "Sakura-san, please step closer."

 _Our cue, I guess,_ she thinks. She squeezes Sasori's hand gently, and they approach a spot next to Gaara. She quickly makes sure Sasori's pulse was calm before she places her other hand on his head, her chakra pulsating freely through his body without greater troubles. Gaara gestures her to speak, finally, and she takes a deep breath.

"He's as healthy as he can be. His vitals and motor function accordingly, and there is no cut off to any of his organs when coming into contact with my chakra."

"How are his abilities? What have you taught him so far?" Another man to the right of her speaks up.

"I've been teaching him what I know. His knowledge of the sciences is vastly superior to peers his age. Furthermore," she halts her answer to crouch to Sasori's eye level, and the boy nods at her, folding his hands high enough for the rest of the council to see. It takes little before his hands glow a familiar shade of blue, and he begins to form the hand seals taught by her with ease, before another Sasori appears with a puff of smoke. She smiles, and Sasori beams, dissolving the clone again.

"His chakra control is perfect."

"Impressive. At that age, too." The man to the right of her (she wishes they wore name tags) pipes up again, his arms folded with the elbows resting on the table. "Good job, kid."

Sasori isn't entirely used to compliments sourced outside of her person, which – she assumes is the reason he hasn't spoken a single word so far – but his cheek flush in modest pride and his eyes avert to meet the older man's. Sakura can't help but to smile again.

 _You go, little man!_

Ryusa's bad mood to little to temper with her good one. "Fine, I guess Konoha ninja aren't entirely mediocre after all."

"The mission will proceed without any problems, I assume?" Gaara asks her, but his eyes are fixated on the small child beside her.

Sakura is about to reply, when another voice cuts into her's. „Kazekage-sama, may I propose something?"

„Of course, Elder Goza."

The said Elder in question looks to be same age group as Elder Ryusa, his trimmed beard mostly covered in gray hair, save for a couple speckles here and there. „Haruno-san, can you assure us of his positive development?"

„Of course, Elder Goza." Sakura says, her eyes not wavering from the man's, daring him to mouth incompetence on her part.

He sighs.

"I suggest we speed the mission up and train him here, then."

 _Wait, what?_

"Gaara-san, I don't think that's a good idea-"

„Kazekage-sama, we shouldn't force ourselves to make the same mistake Chiyo made under my father's orders. We have to keep a close eye on him."

Sasori edges closer to her immediately, his hands grabbing her robe tightly. She lets her fingers run through his hair to calm him down, but can't bring herself to peel her eyes off Goza.

She didn't like where this was going, at all.

„Elder Goza, with all due respect, a change of plan was not to be discussed, today."

„Kazekage-sama, the medic just said that her work is basically done." The old man furthest of her position says. „He needs to be taught the puppet technique. We should take it from here."

Murmurs of agreement echo through the room, and she can feel Sasori shaking body trying to glue himself to her person.

Was everyone just out to piss her off, these days?

„Elder Joseki" Gaara begins, his hands back to being on the table. „Agreements are agreements. I don't think that such matters should be ordered without asking the parties involved."

Gaara turns around to eye Sasori then. Sakura encourages him gently to not hide behind her, and he steps next to her, hands still grasping her robe.

„Would you like to stay here?"

Sasori doesn't speak, but after a moment he shakes his head firmly, big fearful brown eyes struggling to meet Gaara's iced green ones. Gaara nods and returns his attention back to the table.

Sakura releases a breath she didn't realize she was holding.

"I don't see why we're trying to fix Chiyo's slip up here by repeating our mistakes, Kazekage-sama." Ryusa pipes in, and her revilement vanquishes the moment he finishes his sentence.

"Chiyo was a disobedient hack. If it weren't for her we wouldn't be in the position we are right now." Joseki replies, his face as grim as Ryusa's. _Chiyo_ sounded like pure venom on his lips, it-

It begins to ignite something else in her. Something of the unpleasant sort.

Sakura couldn't tell where her slight annoyance ended and her simmering rage started, but she hopes Sasori wasn't startled by her sudden change in mood.

„Elder Joseki, may I say something?" she begins, her voice as calm as she possibly could muster.

Joseki doesn't reply, but she could do without his invitation.

„I don't appreciate you and your colleagues disrespecting on the legacy of another Honored Elder. Elder Chiyo is regarded as a hero in our village, and neither the Kazekage nor I would be alive without her sacrifice." Her fingers travel from Sasori's hair to his shoulder, and she holds him closer without peeling her eyes of Joseki's figure. ´"Have a little respect, Elder Joseki."

The hushed whispers of the other men cease abruptly. She vaguely makes out Elder Sajo swiveling in his chair to get a better look at her.

"Respect from the Leaf? Of all places?"

"All I ask you – Elder of the Suna council – to not speak so callously of her." She's desperately trying to calm her pulse, but the fond memory of holding Elder Chiyo's body, her last words towards her – it doesn't help in soothing the crack in her voice. „I apologize."

Few men in the room avert their gaze, while others keep their stubborn stares on her. She wasn't entirely sure if she made it better or worse. It takes a while for anyone to speak up, and Elder Sajo is the first to do so.

„We appreciate your blessings on the matter, Kunoichi, but I'm not sure you know the full extend of Chiyo's person."

„People make mistakes, Elder Sajo. Not knowing about me didn't prevent Elder Chiyo from saving my life, despite my loyalty to the Leaf."

"Medic, you know nothing of our village's rich history. If it weren't for Chiyo's grandeur fuck up, we wouldn't be here, today." Joseki spits back, his eyes daring her to mouth another oh-so-clever comeback.

Except that she was exceptionally emotional today, and would love to return the favour.

 _Nobody spits on Chiyo on her watch._

"With all due respect, Elder Joseki." She takes another deep breath, before locking her eyes on him. "Shut the fuck up."

Gaara, bless him, intervenes before she was about to let go of Sasori to rearrange the old man's sputtering into non-audible sounds-.

"That will be all for today, gentlemen. If any of you have something else to say, you're free to see me in my office."

* * *

Kankuro enters the room as soon as the last of Council – save for Gaara – exits the room. Baki hurries after him to close the door, leaving the 5 of them in the big room.

Kankuro doesn't waste any time in getting to the point. „So, what's the verdict?"

"He'll be staying with me." Sakura replies swiftly, back to holding the child's hand. „That's the verdict."

„Oh," It doesn't seem like something Kankuro wants to hear, and her eyes narrow. „So...you aren't planning to stay a while longer? You can have the house for as long as you like, right lil' bro?"

„Sakura-san can't stay here, Kankuro. She isn't actually related nor tied to anyone of our descent that would allow it." Gaara replies, unfazed by the disappointment spread over Kankuro's face. Yesterday's conversation flashes before her eyes, and she hopes to any higher beings that Kankuro didn't try to trick her into actually _becoming_ a citizen of Suna. Gaara's voice draws her out of her thoughts again, however. „Would it be alright for you to stay another two days? I'm afraid my sister won't be able to accompany you any sooner than that."

„That's alright with me, thank you Gaara-san."

Gaara nods, seemingly satisfied with the plan of events before he motions Baki and Kankuro to follow him into his office. Kankuro is the last to follow, but not passing her a card of some sort.

„You're welcome. Make sure to say Hi before you leave."

She blinks, then blinks again – at least he honored his part of the deal. „Thanks."

* * *

It's the late afternoon when the two make their way to Suna's hospital, changed back into their respective civilian garments. She's been trying to keep Sasori awake at all costs, seeing as he has to be unconscious for the brain scan, so they've been up and about since this morning, exploring the central area of the village. To Sakura's luck, they even managed to spot one of her older favorite restaurants.

The citizens of Suna were a lot less vary of them, she noticed. Most passing her by would spare her a greeting, and Sasori a smile. It helped that Sasori blended a lot easier into the terrain here, technically being a citizen of the Sand himself, so she supposed it left the others to do the math – She found that she didn't mind so much to being seen as a mother here as she was in Konoha, as alien as the role itself still seemed to her. More than anything, she was happy to see Sasori a lot less shy with the people around him, not having to fear judging stares and less than pleasant remarks.

As the tall complex of Suna's general hospital comes into view, so does the end of her string of luck, she supposes.

„Sakura-chan!"

„Naruto!" She hushes that part, considering she was about to _sneak into a building_. „Can you not alert the entirety of Suna that I'm here?"

„Here to do what exactly, ugly?" Sai chimes in, ever so incapable of human tact.

Sakura crosses her arms, and musters the two of them. „Were you two following me around all day?"

Sai rubs his chin, his eyes upturned in thought. „Not exactly, not like you were worth to follow around on our free day."

„We came to apologize, Sakura-chan." Naruto begins hastily, stepping closer to emphasize those big apologetic puppy eyes of his. "For what happened at camp. I'm sorry."

„Can this wait until we're inside? I don't have much time left for-" Sakura sighs. Sasori was just about to pass out on her shoulder. „Just follow me – and be quiet."

The complex wasn't significantly larger than she remembered it to be, just upgraded in more ways than one – Kankuro wasn't lying when he told her about Suna being on par with Konoha in this field. The back entrance was unguarded as usual, however, and they had no traps or alarms that would alert the staff to their presence. Normally, she wouldn't even bother with remaining undetected, but she was keen on not ending up in interrogation today – and neither of the sand siblings should be making the mistake of mouthing the name Kabuto with the amount of security they had.

Sakura hands the dozing Sasori over to Sai before swiping her card to gain access to the more technologically advanced part of the building, and had no trouble finding the ECG, sealing the door when everyone was inside. The room itself had the machine, bed and table set up for the patient in one room, while the actual source of operation was in another room, seperated by a glass wall – She supposes they had enough funds for the cosmetic change.

Sakura hoped that no other doctor had this room scheduled for the next two hours.

„Sai, please place Shuuya into the chair. I'll set him up. Naruto, could you watch over him while we're using the machine?" she instructs quietly, a yawn dangerously close to escaping her mouth. – She was definitely going to take a nap herself after this.

„Sure thing, Sakura-chan."

„Please alert me should he wake up or show any other abnormal behavior." She opened the glass door, motioning Sai to follow her. „I'm going to start the ECG, soon."

The room was surprisingly sound proof, she notices, Naruto's reply not being audible when she closes the glass door. It's not until she's set up the right co-ordinations, and the machine emits the familiar buzz to notify her that it was working properly, that Sai speaks up.

„Now, ugly, would you tell us why we're here? Might it be related to your swimming incident?"

Sakura wasn't going to be able to talk herself out of this one – Sai's past as root left him a lot more unsafer to lie to than Naruto.

„Kabuto. He tried to kidnap Shuuya while you were under a gen-jutsu." Just the name pisses her off at this point. „Don't know whether it didn't work or he didn't use it on me, but I managed to get him back in time."

„Laying alongside the river with a cracked spine doesn't sound like it was that easy." Sai replies, his eyes focused on the sleeping child in the other room.

"We...ran into some complications."

The soft buzz of the machine and the gentle tap of her nails against the clipboard is the only background noise that accompanies them.

„Your son eerily reminds me of someone I saw in the war, back when I fought against my resurrected brother."

The first waves appear on the monitor, and she scribbles the numbers down.

„Oh? And who would that be?"

„If Kankuro were to be believed, Sasori of the Red Sand." Sai says, as if he were talking about the weather.

She halts in her notes, but doesn't look at the man next to her, her gaze glued to the monitor. „You should get your eyes checked."

„Hag, my eyes are perfectly fine. It didn't click until you mentioned Kabuto."

 _Why does everyone around her loves to ask questions if they were going to see through her lies anyways?_

"Alright, what do you know?"

„Nothing, to be precise. I was going to ask you why you were covering for someone you murdered." he replies, his stare on her wholly unnerving. He takes the clipboard swiftly before she could fully hide her face behind it, and continues to write down the numbers on the monitor. „Talk"

She crosses her arms, but makes no attempt to get the clipboard back.

„It's a highly classified mission, Sai."

„I'm former root. Your words won't leave this room until you allow me to."

„It's complicated-"

„Do you _want_ me to share my intel with Naruto or not?"

 _Blackmail, classy._

She sighs. „The boy is a reincarnated Sasori. Suna's cooperated with Orochimaru to make it happen, and I'm the one who's supposed to raise him until he's old enough to continue his training here."

„Orochimaru?" Sai asks, his face grimacing at the thought of the evil snake man. Or maybe he was just thinking of something nice to say. „If Orochimaru is in on it, then why would Kabuto try to bring him back?"

Her thoughts wander back to that night. The unfamiliar glint of anger in Kabuto's eyes, his disappointment over being caught, the way he spoke of Sasori, as if he was a tumor cell that's been plaguing him his entire life-

„I believe Kabuto has a vendetta against Sasori. The former Sasori, that is."

„It makes sense, we were the one's to sabotage their meeting at the Tenchi bridge."

„I'm not aware of how Sasori's spy network actually operated, but Kabuto spoke of torture – or at the very least implied it to have happened at Sasori's hands."

Sai's reply is nonchalant. „We have something in common then."

Sakura cringes. The comfortable quietness suddenly seems awkward. „Sai, you mentioned seeing a resurrected Sasori in the war. What was he like?"

„I was too busy fighting my brother for most of the time that he was conscious, so Kankuro had the pleasure of conversating with him."

„ _Kankuro_ talked to Sasori?"

The puppeteers sparkling eyes, his insistence on her person, his stubborn talks of second chances. – It suddenly made sense.

"Sasori didn't put up much of a fight in the end, if that is what you wanted to know."

She's curious now. „Did he say something?"

A clipboard enters her line of vision, and turns away to open the glass door to join Naruto. „Ugly, I wasn't the one to seal him. You'd have to ask him."

„Wa-, Sai, please hold on for a second?" she is tempted to take those words back, but her gut tells her differently – she should place her trust in them. „You..Will you tell Naruto? For me?" She tacks on, in case he needed the clarification.

Sai looks at her for a moment, before he disappears behind the glass door.

The rest of the ECT was spent in silence.

* * *

„That's weird." she mumbles as she enters the room, cross-checking the results with her memory of the last check-up.

„Are you done, Sakura-chan?"

"Yeah, it seems that I was right about-" her eyes travel between the two of them, and Sai nods. „About Kabuto. The numbers don't match, anymore."

„What exactly did he do?" Naruto asks, his arm still propped on the bed Sasori lied on, making sure not to step on any of the cables attached to the head.

„I initially assumed he only dispelled the gen-jutsu, but it seems like he lifted the blockades in his brain all together. The machine noted higher activity of waves and chakra activity-"

„Okay, but what does it do to him?" Sai asks, his body leaning against the wall the window was situated at, signaling that the Sun was ready to set soon.

„I-...I have no idea." She lowers her clipboard, at a loss. „I was hoping it would be a side effect of the gen-jutsu. I will have to monitor him more closely when we're back in Konoha."

„That's fine, Sakura-chan." Naruto flashes her a toothy smile. „You're a great medic, you'll figure it out."

His first attempt at an apology right in front of the hospital in still nagging at her thoughts, the brief fight they had about a simple letter, her constant fear of Team 7's reality – yet he didn't change his mind about her, remained a steady pillar when her waves of anixety and self-doubts crashed against it.

He didn't deserve her outburst.

„I'm sorry too, Naruto. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that." Sakura says – she just couldn't bring herself to be mad at Naruto, no matter how hard she tried. "Still friends?"

Naruto overcomes the restraint for her, enveloping her in a hug. "No more secrets, Sakura-chan."

She barely remembers the last time she felt this save around him.

 _No more secrets…_

Sai's voice can be heard from the other side of the room. „That's right, ugly- Hey, don't glare at me like that."

„Huh?" Sakura looks over Naruto's shoulder to see Sai looking at-

Sasori, wide-awake, of all people. The cables were still attached to his head, and he didn't make an attempt to sit up-right, but his arms were crossed. His soft voice rings through the room.

„Mama isn't ugly."

„Hag, I think your kid also needs to get his eyes checked."

Sasori pouts. „Mama also isn't a hag."

"How do you feel?" Sakura asks, fleeing Naruto's hug just in time to prevent Sasori from getting up. „You shouldn't be awake for another half an hour."

He shrugs from where he's laying, not really sure how to answer. „I'm not really tired, Mama."

„That's-" She checks the other pulse monitor in the room on more time, finding no unusual vitals. „Strange."

Sasori scratches his head, and one of the cables plops out. She's been doing an awful lot of sighing, today. „I guess those can go, too."

Sasori rubs the substance off his hands. „I don't like sand."

„Me too. _Especially_ when it gets caught in your pants." Naruto assists Sakura in removing the last cables, and Sasori gives him a funny look.

Sai smiles. „See, not even children want to hear about your-"

„Anyways" Her incoming headache is a reminder that she hasn't been able to grab a bite since lunch, among other things. „Anyone up for dinner?"

* * *

In hindsight, she should have brought those pills along with her.

Images of fire, the unbearable smell of burning bodies, the copper taste of blood filling her mouth overwhelmed all of her senses as she keeled over the sink in the kitchen, desperate to make the vivid images of the nightmare go away. When her mind finally calms down enough to bring clarity to her blurred tear streaked vision, the clock strikes midnight.

Of course there was no other medicine in this house, and she didn't trust herself to use chakra in this tousled state, so she resigned herself to laying on the couch, a glass of water accompanying her on the coffee table.

The cool breeze of the room helped her sweating self, but also reminded her of her own odor. _I desperately need a bath._

A wave of pain runs through her like a lightning bolt when she turns around, alerting her of the wound in her back that she has yet to fix. _A change of bandages would be nice, too._

23 minutes it took to calm her panic attack down. A new record.

A small voice eventually echoes through the corridors, and before she knows it, Sasori's standing there, looking down at her sweaty aching self.

„...I couldn't sleep."

She doesn't dare to move her body, as she would usually do, instead she spares him a glance. „It's ok, me neither."

Since they neglected to bring his stuffed toy, he's squeezing a spare pillow instead, and contends with sitting on the coffee table to watch her, swinging his legs absentmindedly. His hair was more tousled than usual.

Figuring that it would help to make her forget about the pain, her mouth aches to fill the silence in the room.

„Did you have a bad dream?"

Sasori shrugs, and Sakura rubs her eyes. „I had a bad dream."

He balances the pillow on his lap to hold up both of his hands, and she takes the cue. „It's a solid 7, maybe a good 8 out of 10."

The hands are replaced by Sasori's remorseful expression, and she feels guilty for even having to let him see her like this. „I'm sorry."

„You can't help it, Mama."

„That is true too, I guess."

Sakura twists the arm that she wasn't laying on behind her back, easing enough chakra into the wound to numb the pain, but not to completely heal it. Another shock of pain runs through her body, and she grits her teeth.

"Can I help?" Sasori's small unassuming voice floats through the room, and for a moment she forgets that they were in Suna and not in their small apartment.

"Do you know where my bag is? I have to change my bandages. Shower before that."

Sasori hops of the table, leaving the pillow with her to go fetch the items.

She's had worse, she could handle it.

* * *

„Oh, that looks… still not good."

„I don't even want to imagine." Sakura replies, trying to sit as upright on this small stool they took from the bathroom as possible as Sasori stands behind her, looking at the disinfected wound. Turns out that the old bandages contributed a lot to the source of that odor. She pressed the beginning of the cotton to her rib cage and begins to wrap it around her back, Sasori helping her in passing it around. It was unsurprisingly easier than doing it alone when slugs could do nothing but to stare at her.

„Okay, that should be all." He says, turning around to hand her the kunai from her bag. Sakura cuts the binding off and ties the knots tight enough to last her another night.

„Thank you."

When Sakura finished putting her shirt on, she finally feels like a somewhat decent person. She would try to heal it herself if she wasn't completely riled. The clock reads far past midnight, but neither of them showed any sign of fatigue – She definitely needed a distraction, right now.

Well, the late night always provided the wildest ideas, sometimes.

„Hey, you're up for some exploring?"she asks, dragging the bag in front of her to pack her belongings back into it.

„But in the dark?"Sasori asks, confused by her newfound excitement.

She's also remembered the flashlight Kankuro left and manages to take it out after a couple seconds of blind digging. „We have this."

God, she felt like a little kid all over again.

„Don't worry, I'm the strongest person in the world, remember? Nothing will happen while I'm around."She smiles at him in reassurance.

Or at least that what Sasori liked to call her every time they went to the training grounds and he ended up sitting on her back while she was doing her regular round of push-ups – it helps her to convince him to jump out of his tiny circle, at least.

Sasori beams at her, and they set out to re-visit the house together. They start at the very front of the house, right where the kitchen and entrance room met, and continued further into the back, shining light into every room in hopes that they'd (Sasori) happen to discover an ancient fortune. The first night she's been here she actually didn't pay close attention to any room in particular, so she's stunned at the amount of guest rooms Chiyo's house contains. The majority of the beds were dust ridden or otherwise empty, so that didn't amount to much treasure on Sasori's part.

There's one thing she was curious about, however.

„Did Lady Chiyo really live here? It's so barren."Sasori asks, his turn to hold the flashlight on the second floor resulting in a much lower ratio – but he insisted, and so she complied.

„Well, Lady Chiyo hasn't lived here for a while, I suppose."Sakura grabs a random door to find it-

...Locked?

„Mama, maybe there's a treasure in there!"Sasori exclaims, the fact that they were edging towards ungodly hours not once shown on his face. „Can you open it?"

Her curiosity is sparked too – but she had second thoughts about trying the break down a door of a home she didn't even own-

Eh, Elder Ebizo wouldn't be too mad about it, she hopes.

Sakura and Sasori share a grin as he steps back and she grabs the handle, concentrating enough chakra into her fist to successfully break through the rusted lock.

„Oh, I think someone left the door open."she says, gently stubbing the door with her foot, checking both sides of the hallway just in case an army of puppets is about to swallow them whole.

„You _need_ to teach me that."Sasori walks past her in order to illuminate the room.

„Uh-huh, and have you consider a career as a petty thief? I think not."Sakura replies, squinting her eyes to make out the contents of this room.

Shelves filled to the brim with books, scrolls upon scrolls stacked on top of each other; a lowered table was pushed against the corner of the narrow room allowing enough moonlight to filter through the window. Just like the rest of the house, no electric lighting is to be found.

This must have been an office.

„Hey, I think we discovered a treasure right here."

She leaves the door slightly ajar, which limits their moving space just barely, and Sasori pointing the flashlight high enough allows her to skim through the titling of dusty scrolls and brownish books. Carefully, she picks out a couple that stand out to her and moves them to the lowered table.

"Sasori, point the flashlight here."

"Okay, Mama."

None of the scrolls were sealed, just like the books, making her believe that they either weren't strong enough to last the past decades they were left untouched – or that the locked door would suffice either way. Carefully, she begins to the unfold the first scroll, and she has to squint her eyes to make out the faded lettering of the date, scrawled hastily on the top of the brown paper. Sasori points the flashlight closer to the writing itself – faded, but readable - and her eyes widen when she skims over the content.

"These are council reports!"

"Council reports from over 40 years ago." Sasori adds in, the glee in his voice adding to the surprise of hers. "What do they say?"

This one wasn't of any value if she were to be exact, listing the amount of resources available to them at the time. The next one, a couple months later, just talked about a change in seating. Chiyo isn't mentioned in the assortment of members of the next scroll either, which led her to assume that she wrote these herself.

"Not different from my time under Tsunade, I'm afraid."

Sasori is looking over her shoulder while she's seated at the lower table, and while she can't see him, she definitely hears his exalted breath of disappointment. Sakura snorts.

"I doubt they kept actual classified information behind broken locks, unfortunately. Besides," Sakura says, turning around. "I think it's time for you to crawl under the covers."

"I'm not tired." Sasori pipes in, but his struggle to keep his eyes open any further told her differently. _It'd be more than suspicious if he hasn't gotten tired from her plan of walking him into exhaustion,_ she thinks.

Her legs only ache a little when she rises from the lowered table and takes back the flashlight. "Come on, I'll walk you there. I just have to go over a couple more notes before I can sleep."

The room wasn't too far from the guest room, she discovers eventually, just a couple rounded corners that hid it from plain sight. Sasori compiles without complaint, the feeling of actually being in a bed no doubt helping his fast track into going back to sleep, and she makes his small tired voice out just barely. "Mama."

Her body is propped against the edge of the mattress, her fingers itching to run through his thick curled hair just like she always does when she's at unease herself.

It was strange, how many particular emotions he evoked in her, and how often her thoughts were drawn back to him as a source of comfort.

"What's on your mind?" Sakura whispers.

Sasori's little hand pokes out from under the blanket and folds over hers. His voice quivers.

"You won't leave me here with these scary people, will you?"

 _Eventually, I have to. You don't belong to me_. she should say, needs to say but whatever's left of her conscience doesn't come to grab her by the throat.

She has to say goodbye one day, eventually, so let her dream just for a little longer.

"Of course not."

Sasori smiles, before his eyes finally close.

* * *

It's nearly 3 when she makes it back to the room, the cold air against her bare legs no doubt the cause of her goosebumps. Sakura was glad for the faint writings on the scrolls, and the terrible lighting, or else Sasori would have picked up on her fib fast.

The council's words, their harsh criticism on whatever Chiyo had done in her lifetime – it nagged at her, and ever so stubborn she was, she would get to the bottom of it.

Sakura's failed to mention to him the comments Chiyo had scrawled next to the reports, one more judgmental than the other, so it definitely was her who wrote them. Sadly, none of them were in chronological order, and she might just have messed it up even more herself (oops), so she grabs as many as she can, placing them on the floor next to her. She's almost through the entire shelf, on her toes to grab the last remaining scroll on the top row, when the shelf rattles and a ton of books come flying down on-

Her poor head.

"Shit!" Sakura hisses, a tiny amount of green chakra on the hand her head was holding, and she groans when she realizes that half of them just lost their bindings. This is going to take forever to reassemble, lest a member of Suna's security force tells Ebizo about her shenanigans that would definitely not work in her favor.

Maybe she could put them all back in their place, and hopes nobody would need any of this in the near future. Sakura grabs the first stacks of paper that stand out to her, the closest binding being that of black leather, and she lays it on the table to crosscheck the inside and title.

"The Art of-" Sakura falters in her tone, wide awake when she realizes what she is holding in her hands.

"Puppetry."

Her mind goes back to the creepy room this home housed, and the council's demands, flipping through the pages as carefully as possible, amazed at the amount of rich information displayed in front of her, from the requirements of perfect chakra control to basic building techniques to special remedies against the common danger of arthritis. Chiyo must have written this herself, too.

Her fingers itch once more – but not with the need to touch something. No.

It was her drive to learn, to hone, to _perfect_.

She knows where the room was located, she thinks, grabbing the sheets of paper and her flashlight.

 _Just for an hour, Sakura._

She promised Sasori she'd be back quickly, after all.

* * *

It hasn't been her intention to pass the flower shop this late in the morning, nor was it her intention to buy a couple of them, and it definitely has not been her intention to make the trip to outer skirts of the village right after the both of them stepped a foot out of the house.

But here she was, flowers in one hand, holding Sasori's hand with the other, looking to see if she was able to spot what she was looking for. - Chiyo was certainly persistent in not leaving her thoughts.

"We're here." she says, coming to halt before an assortment of graves, each with their respective Kanji engraved into them. They bore no last names of course, as Suna didn't carry family registers and the importance of clan names the way Konoha has always done, the villages of Wind country being a product of nomads and bandits. - It was only the proximity of the buried that allowed insight into family ties and trees.

Sakura takes a deep breath

"Hello, Lady Chiyo," she begins, "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

She wonders what lives might they have lead in the absence of war.

"Nine years. I'm sorry for not dropping by more. I-" Her mind travels back to the last words Chiyo has gifted her in one moment, holding her lifeless body in her bruised arms in the next, and she struggles to keep her voice steady. "I hope you weren't worried about me"

Sakura glances over to Sasori, who was grabbing onto a couple flowers he picked out from the store himself, his eyes fixated on the graves in front of him, as if he was deep in thought.

 _I hope that this is what you would want, too._

"Mama," his voice draws her out of her _own_ thought's, and it takes a her moment to process that he addressed her. Sasori doesn't return her gaze, however.

"Was she very important to you?"

She would have expected him to ask her this question, eventually, but she's still thrown off actually hearing it. Was she supposed to be honest with him, admit that the entire reason she knew this woman so well in the first was because of him in a past life? That Chiyo had saved the lives of not only her, but the Kazekage as well? That the reason for the latter's near death had been-

Jumbled theories that helped her little in progress but gave her fears of massive regressions on his part.

He was still a child, however – and she's depressed him with her own worries more than enough in the past couple days.

"Oh, very much so." Sakura stretches her arms out as much as she possible could with her injury still in tact, sending him a cheesy beam. "About thiiis much."

"Really?" Sasori retorts, seemingly unsatisfied with just that answer. "Was it true what the men said about Lady Chiyo?"

Sakura shakes her head. "I don't know, Sasori – but I trusted Lady Chiyo with my life. Whatever she did, it'd feel unfair to pin it solely on her, now."

"I see.."

They fall into silence, only gentle winds left to make a sound, giving her the time to pay her proper respects.

She places a flower in front of three graves – Chiyo's, her son's, and his wife's. - It's no surprise to her that a fourth grave was nowhere to be found, much to her disappointment.

Sasori hesitates just for a moment, before following her example.

Sakura hears feet shuffling her, and before she knows it, a different song joins them.

"My sister hasn't had visitors in a while." Ebizo says, coming to a stop beside her, his hands folded behind his back. If there's anything that definitely hasn't changed, it was the fact that she could for the life of her not see if he had eyes at all, his eyebrows doing a good job of drawing a shadow to deep it was impossible to make out.

"Honored Grandfather Ebizo," Sakura begins, bowing deep in respect for Suna's Elder. "We wanted to thank you for letting us stay in your house."

"My sister would have insisted on it. It's all yours." Ebizo smiles, mustering the flowers they left behind. "That was very kind of you."

"It was only appropriate." Sakura says, her stance upright in the presence of someone not only she highly respected. "Thank you too, Honored Grandfather Ebizo."

"I hope it wouldn't be too much of an inconvenience for the two of you to join me for tea, would it?" Ebizo asks, the hands fastened behind his back now at his sides. "There's something I'd like to show you, Haruno-san."

She bows, and Sasori eventually copies her. "Of course."

Ebizo's smiles before turning back around. Sakura begins to follow him, slowly, before she realizes Sasori hasn't moved at all.

"What's wrong?" Sakura asks, at loss for his reluctance.

Sasori averses his eyes briefly, before turning back to the grave.

Sakura regards the scenery, and her stomach sinks, as if she's swallowed stones.

She knows why she was disappointed over the lack of a fourth grave.

Slowly, he bends down, and begins to reassemble the flowers, making sure the wind wouldn't ruin it by placing small stones on top of them, taking his time. He takes a deep breath before he speaks.

"We broke into your study, and looked at your stuff. We're really sorry, Lady Chiyo." Sasori says, bowing once more before returning to her side to follow Ebizo.

She hoped Ebizo hasn't actually heard that part.

* * *

Ebizo's house wasn't any smaller than Chiyo's had been, with the exception that it was much wider, whiter, and lively – housing several children - orphans, he told her – that would pass them at frequent intervals. "It's not the only one Suna has," he told her "but the Kazekage agreed to let a couple stay here. It is lonely ever since my sister passed, and they help me out here and there."

"I apologize for the delay. I'm not the youngest sport, you see." Ebizo says after Sakura has helped him sit down. She's agreed to let Sasori is playing with older children, meanwhile – best if he isn't around for more personal questions.

"Suna is quite indebted to you for saving the lives of both Gaara and Kankuro, my child." Ebizo begins, his hands holding a cup of herbal tea.

The old man contrasted his sister, Sakura picks up quickly – if Chiyo had been a roaring fire, he stands for the sea. - Calming, is the effect he has on her. "Konoha was only happy to help."

"We both left the council a long time ago, but a gentleman named Baki informed us once in a while." Ebizo takes a sip, before he continues. "I imagine they weren't very pleased with your cooperation."

She thinks back to the grumbles in the council room, and grimaces. "If I may ask, Honored Grandfather Ebizo, who did give the order? Gaara-san?"

"It was a joint decision, as far as I am told." Ebizo replies, his hands folded over each other.

"And...you approved it?" her eyebrow raises, like she can't believe she's asking this.

"It was not my idea." Ebizo replies. "I've resigned from helping the council a long time ago."

Which reminds her-

"The council didn't…" Sakura's not sure how to word the old men's' blatant hate for Chiyo to this other sweet old man. "Didn't seem to like her very much." _What happened all those years ago_? She wants to asks, but she's not sure anyone in this village is willing to tell her.

Sakura wasn't really sure if Ebizo's eyes went upwards in thought – because she couldn't _see_ his eyes under those heavy eyebrows – so it just seems like he's staring ahead. Eventually, he responds.

"You have seen the Third, yes? His disappearance was caused by my-" Ebizo looks over her shoulder, checking to see if anyone was at the door, before turning back to her. "My grand-nephew. We didn't retire until my sister sealed the Shukaku into the Fourth's son, though. The village went through a lot of...troubles during that time. It was not until then that the rest turned against her."

"The rest?"

"My sister was... not fond of the administration this village housed. We were among the first members of the council, and we've experienced war. Sunagakure has never been a powerful village, my child."

It takes her a lot of willpower not to interrupt him, going off tangents isn't what she wants to hear, what she needs to know – but Chiyo's notes provided just as little information, so she waits.

"She always had a strong character, my big sister. I never had children, but she buried her only son. You were there when she attacked the Sixth, yes?"

Sakura nods, and Ebizo continues.

"She was reluctant to give her only kin away, but the war left us with many losses, and the village needed the shinobi. My grand-nephew was recruited back then, and served the village for many years, as young as he was. We fell into debts regardless, an agricultural cooperation the way the Leaf and the Sand lead it now, we depended on the Daimyo's resources. Eventually, the council..."

They are getting somewhere.

"What did the council do?" she asks.

"The council sold our young shinobi to be the Daimyo's guard. The Daimyo was not a respected man, however. Many enemies, and our shinobi compensated for the debt with their lives."

"Sasori." His names slips past her lips in a hushed whisper. "He left the village, didn't he?"

"He was our most talented child, a remarkable craftsman and a feared shinobi. The Daimyo asked for him, my grand-nephew. My sister opposed it."

"Chiyo helped him escape?"

Ebizo shakes his head.

"That is what the council thought, too. My sister was not able to prevent it, in the end, but she didn't aid him. The Third disappeared shortly after, my child."

 _I'm so sorry_ , she wants to say, but the words are stuck in her throat.

"There is something I would like you to have." Ebizo says, his hands fiddling with another cup of green tea. He points towards a bookshelf to the left of them. "Be a dear and bring me the book with the green binder."

Sakura's surprised at his request, but complies nonetheless, carefully placing the big book into Ebizo's lap. She isn't sure whether is appropriate to sit back down, and so she stays where she is watching Ebizo open what appears to be an album of some sort. His shaky fingers stop turning the pages somewhere in the middle, and a small photographs appears in his hand, regarding it briefly, before he gives it to her.

Her eyes widen.

"I-,I couldn't possibly-"

A family of four, Chiyo standing to the side while a man and a woman were hoisting up a small child, his hair as red as she knows it to be.

Sasori's parents. Happier times.

"I do imagine that this would be safer with you than with a man whose days are counted." Ebizo smiles as much as his heavy wrinkles allow him, and closes the album, placing it on the table next to him.

"Are you sure?" Sakura asks again, her gaze wholly fixated on the picture in her hands, like she couldn't believe _it was real._ It's a surreal experience, seeing an exact copy of her child in a past life-.

Sasori, not her child. He didn't belong to her.

"Dear, do you what day is, today?" Ebizo asks out of nowhere, seeming genuinely unknowing.

Sakura blinks, then blinks, again.

"November 8th, Honored Grandfather."

"November 8th…" He murmurs, lost in his thoughts, and she has half a mind to question if he's forgotten a particular important meeting.

"I believe it is time for you to pick him up, the children are about to leave for their meal." Ebizo interrupts her train of thought gently, and she then just realizes that he's back on his feet, while she was more or less standing in his way.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Sakura bursts out, jumping out the way. Ebizo has his hands folded behind his back again, looking at nothing in particular.

"It is no problem, dear. If you have some time, we could tend to that wound of yours. My hands aren't what they used to be, but I do hold personal medics in this house. I do know a hurting back when I see one."

"That's-" She stores the picture away in her pouch, mindfully, before she speaks. "Thank you, that would be a big help."

They spot Sasori as some sort of indoor lake, a boy a couple years above his age instructing him on how to properly hold a fishing rod. The thing is too big for him of course, and so the older boy is holding onto it with one hand while showing him what to do. Another child spots them, and the older boy in question finally turns around.

"Oh hey, it's your mum, kiddo."

Sasori beams, abandoning the rod in one moment and wrapping himself around her person in another, just nearly knocking her off her feet.

"Hey, I wasn't gone for too long, you know." Sakura laughs, returning the hug. "We can go in a bit, too."

* * *

It early evening when they finally leave Ebizo's house, her wound freshly bandaged and nearly completely healed (Suna's medics weren't nearly as fast as her – and she instructed the nervous shinobi through half of it – but she's glad that she didn't have to turn to the hospital for aid).

"What did Elder Ebizo say?" Sasori asks, fiddling with a small rubber ball that the children gifted to him. "Was it important?"

"It was...interesting, I'd say." Sakura's not really sure how to answer him, really.

"He's Lady Chiyo's brother, right?" He asks again, this time stopping to look at her, curiosity scrawled across his face, like he's waiting for her to say something of value.

He isn't highly skilled for nothing, after all.

"Elder Ebizo said Chiyo didn't do much wrong. The old geezers out there were just jealous of her success." Sakura eventually says. That was at least partly true, she thinks.

 _Distract him, Sakura._

"Oh hey, you up for some candy?" She points towards a small store of what she _assumed_ was a candy store, the sweet smells overpowering the rest around it.

She discovered his sweet tooth early on, considering she was one herself – and she's tried her damnedest to not cause him to have several cavities by the time he was 10 – but a little treat hasn't hurt anyone.

Besides, this is clearly the happiest she's seen him this trip, bouncing around her in order to just make her hurry up.

Sasori's hand is back to being tightly wrapped around hers as they skip into the store, and for the first time in a while, she feels completely relaxed.

* * *

 _It was at last, that she returned, a couple of shinobi behind her carrying more body bags into the village._

 _He's lost count of the times he's checked the lists himself, before Chiyo herself led him to the crematoriums._

 _He thought about it during training, tears threatening to spill – but he knew, if others found out, he'd be hit again._

 _He doesn't cry anymore._

" _His progress is excellent, Lady Chiyo, but his courage lacks. We've thought of sending him to the field medics with the other children." His instructor hushes, but not quiet enough for him to hear it._

 _Fools._

" _I forbid it." Chiyo says, her tone overpowers his easily. "He doesn't leave the village, it was audacious enough to enroll him behind my back. I couldn't care less about the council's pathetic plans."_

" _Kazekage's orders, Lady Chiyo. All children of the Sand are to be prepared for the battlefield, whether that would require allowances is of no importance."_

" _The Third is no greener than the men at his side, Ichirou. My own son is dead because of his incompetence, you think I will let the last of my kin die for him, too?"_

" _Orders are Orders, Lady Chiyo. It's already decided that he will process to the chunin stage soon, and there's not much we can do about it. You know this village doesn't prioritize childhood over children." Ichirou gets up from the sofa they resided on, a grim expression on his face. "Have a good day."_

 _He couldn't see her from where he was hiding when his instructor left, so he hurries back his room before Chiyo could spot him. It doesn't take her long to join him, however._

" _I know you were listening, Sasori." Chiyo sighs, and Sasori eventually nods at her wordlessly._

" _Follow me." she says, her face is grim. "I think it's time I passed on the family tradition to you."_

 _It was at last, that they disappeared down the hallway into her strange workshop._

* * *

"No more secrets, Naruto." Sakura bumps his side with her fist, sitting around the fire camp with a sleepy Sasori, Sai and freshly recovered Temari. She pouts. "You promised!"

"Alright, Alright!" Naruto rubs said side, cringing at her still unnatural strength. "No more secrets, Sakura-chan. I'll tell you what's in that letter."

Naruto grins, but it was still too dark to see him properly. "I wanted to give you one, too, actually. It's a surprise."

"Well, it wouldn't hurt you to spoil it for me." Sakura says, sending him a smile in return. _Whatever it was, it must be important._

"Ah, well, you see-" She does make out that he's clearly nervous, fiddling his thumbs. "It's a wedding invitation."

Wait-

"A _what!?"_ She blurts out, shocked at the words that _just did not slip out of Naruto's mouth. "_ You sent Sasuke a _what?!"_

She's not the only one who's surprised, Temari sitting upright all of the sudden and Sai seeming a bit off.

"Yeah, uh, a wedding invitation." Naruto repeats, not looking at any of them when he speaks again. "I'm getting married to Hinata."

If there's anything that Sakura realized at this moment, it was that she truly never got Naruto, at all.

* * *

A/N: last time i uploaded a chapter it was before my exam phase, now an entire semester later, i upload this chapter right after my exam phase DKJDKSJVFJJKF im sorry

I REALLY REALLY wanted to focus a bit more on small sasori's and sakura's interaction in this chapter, as well as drawing a couple parallels, so i hope you liked it!

added in a bit of drama there too, you'll see how it's gonna go from here :^)


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